[Ax]

That’s what I said when I killed the emperor scorpion in my Havana living room. Took me three swats with a New Balance shoe to dispatch the gruesome brute.

[Lazamataz]

I'd have hit that scorpion. (cue 70's porn music).

Here is an interesting fable:

Lazamataz and a scorpion meet on the bank of a stream and Lazamataz asks the scorpion to carry him across on its back. The scorpion asks, "How do I know you won't hit me?" The scorpion says, "Because if I do hit it, I will die too."

The scorpion is satisfied, and they set out, but in midstream, Lazamataz starts hitting the scorpion. The scorpion feels the lewd violation, and starts to sink. Knowing they both will drown, but has just enough time to gasp "Why?"

Replies Lazamataz: "It's in my nature...you knew who I was when you agreed to cross with me."

[Grizzled Bear]

That’s what I said when I killed the emperor scorpion in my Havana living room.

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas.