~@@~THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD~@@~

[Lucky9teen]

And now for some cartoons:

[ShadowAce]

IBTP!! WooHoo!!!

[CPOSharky]

The recession has hit everybody really hard...

My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon with only one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, so they re-possessed her!

Truckloads of Americans have been caught sneaking into Mexico.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

Congress says they are looking into the Bernard Madoff scandal. Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the guys who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

And, finally...
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., that I called the Suicide Hotline.
I got a call center in Pakistan and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck or fly an airplane.

[Dacula]

IBTP

Top 5

[Lucky9teen]

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To all the awesome dads out there...

TIME FOR SOME FATHERS DAY

CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST

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[NCC-1701]

!!!!!!!!!!T O P T E N!!!!!!!!!!

[Bean Counter]

[kevkrom]

Top 10 Weinergate Headlines

I still prefer:

Weiner goes soft, pulls out

Pity that not even the NY Post would run with that one...

[LuvFreeRepublic]

Great stuff!!! Stealing some of it for my FB. Thanks all.

[verga]

top 10

[bmwcyle]

DAD ping

[absolootezer0]

Its not the underage drinking I disapprove of, it's your choice of brand that has me worried son

i could see myself saying that.

[BelegStrongbow]

Happy Father’s Day, everyone. :)

[tnlibertarian]

The “Ten and Two!” cartoon reminded me of my son. My three-year-old has now taken it upon himself to say, whenever he notices my not doing so, “You drive TWO hands, Daddy.”

[CPOSharky]

PBTP! Yaahoo.

[Arrowhead1952]

Subject: Women are hard to please

Why it is so difficult to please women.

A wife asks her husband, “Please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6.”

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.

The wife asks him, “Why in the world did you buy 6 cartons of milk?”

He replied, “They had eggs.”

Think about it….

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Subject: 2 Mexican Detectives

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.

‘How was he killed?’ asked one detective.

‘With a golf gun,’ the other detective replied.

‘A golf gun! What is a golf gun?’

‘I don’t know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.’

[Arrowhead1952]

My favorite picture for the congressman.

[Arrowhead1952]

The “Ten and Two!” cartoon reminded me of my son.

Defensive driving now instructs you to keep your hands at four and eight if the vehicle is equipped with air bags. If the air bags deploy and you have your hands at ten and two, the bag will blow your hands off the wheel, if not break your forearms.

[UCANSEE2]

A small Muslim child is found wandering around lost in the shopping mall. A Security guard asks the child what his mother looks like.

He says, “How would I know”?

[ShadowAce]

If the air bags deploy and you have your hands at ten and two, the bag will blow your hands off the wheel,...

If the air bags deploy, you don't need to hold on to the wheel anymore.