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THE OFFICIAL LAST FRIDAY EVER BEFORE DOOMSDAY SILLINESS THREAD

Posted on 05/20/2011 8:31:24 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

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To: GRRRRR

I saw a fundamentalist Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grand River this morning; he was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and bombs he was carrying.

Along with him was an illegal Hispanic drug cartel member who was also struggling to stay afloat because of the large backpack of drugs that was strapped to his back.

If they didn’t get help, they’d surely drown.

Being a responsible Texan and abiding by the law to help those in distress, I informed the El Paso County Sheriff ‘s Office and Homeland Security.

It is now 4pm, both have drowned, and neither authority has responded.

I’m starting to think I wasted two stamps.


121 posted on 05/20/2011 11:14:39 AM PDT by sunny48
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To: sunny48
Senior hay prank closes Durango school for 4 days
122 posted on 05/20/2011 11:20:12 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (Jobs? Nope! Economy? Nope! Disarm the U.S? Yep! Impeach the treasonous Marxist Muslim usurper bast)
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To: TexasCajun

123 posted on 05/20/2011 11:20:26 AM PDT by Godzilla (3-7-77)
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To: ShadowAce
I do like puns, though.

My favorite:


124 posted on 05/20/2011 11:28:42 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Lucky9teen

Subject: A taxpayer’s prayer

Obama is the shepherd I did not want.
He leadeth me beside the still factories.
He restoreth my faith in the Republican party.
He guideth me in the path of unemployment for his party’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the bread line,
I shall fear no hunger, for his bailouts are with me.

He has anointed my income with taxes, my expenses runneth over.
Surely, poverty and hard living will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will live in a mortgaged home forever.

I’m glad … I am American, I am glad … that I am free,

But I wish … I was a dog, and Obama … was a tree!

author unknown


125 posted on 05/20/2011 11:32:34 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (zero hates Texas and we hate him back.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Subject: FW: Five year old Granddaughter

This is one of the funniest ones I’ve seen in a long time.

I was eating lunch on the 20th of February with my 5-year-old granddaughter and I asked her, “What day is tomorrow?”

She said “It’s President’s Day!”

She is a smart kid. So, I asked “What does President’s Day mean?” I was waiting for something about Washington or Lincoln ... etc.

She replied, “President’s Day is when President Obama steps out of the White House, and if he sees his shadow we have one more year of unemployment.”

You know, it hurts when coffee spurts out your nose...


126 posted on 05/20/2011 11:33:55 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (zero hates Texas and we hate him back.)
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To: Godzilla; All; y'all; no one in particular

Guys?

We may be joking around on this thread, but...

Didja see Netanyahu just hand The Won his ass?

Obama was so pissed and dissed he just abruptly ended the conference.

I wouldn’t be all that surprised if our homeboy responded to the public dissing by nuking Israel,

In which case, joke’s on us, Camping got it right!


127 posted on 05/20/2011 11:34:13 AM PDT by null and void (We are now in day 848 of our national holiday from reality. - OBL Dead? The TSA can go away!)
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To: Lucky9teen
“Allen West’s rebuttal to the butt-in-chief’s comments about Israel today....”If Barry wants Israel to return to 1967 borders, how about we return the USA to 1860 and he can be a slave!!!”

Wait, if we go back to the 1860 boarders, won't he be African?

Woopsie, forgot he probably already is!

128 posted on 05/20/2011 11:36:15 AM PDT by I cannot think of a name
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers

NOTHING!... Thank you

129 posted on 05/20/2011 11:37:28 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: null and void

No nully - the blatant ignorance of the 0bama did not escape me nor the predictions for tomorrow. Camping just fits into the picture by ENHANCING the mocking of the soon TRUE return of Christ (Camping is an amillennialist btw). Wish I could have seen Bibi rip 0bama a new one.


130 posted on 05/20/2011 11:40:10 AM PDT by Godzilla (3-7-77)
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To: GRRRRR

This weekend the Cubs are playing the Red Sox at Fenway for the first time since the 1918 World Series. That series went 6 games—first 3 at Comiskey (bigger than Wrigley), then the last 3 at Fenway. (Unusual...but because of travel restrictions, World War I)

Stephen King wrote (BEFORE the Red Sox won it all in 04 and 07) that someday the Red Sox and Cubs would meet again in the world series. They would split the first six games... “and on the eve of Game 7, the world will end”.


131 posted on 05/20/2011 11:44:53 AM PDT by raccoonradio (..)
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To: Lucky9teen

I would clean up 30 bales of of hay for $100,000 and even change the air filters!


132 posted on 05/20/2011 11:44:58 AM PDT by sunny48
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To: r-q-tek86

133 posted on 05/20/2011 11:45:02 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: ShadowAce

134 posted on 05/20/2011 11:55:08 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: ShadowAce

135 posted on 05/20/2011 11:56:13 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: ShadowAce

136 posted on 05/20/2011 11:57:11 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: ShadowAce

137 posted on 05/20/2011 11:57:56 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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Comment #138 Removed by Moderator

To: ShadowAce

#136 & #137 LOL!
#138 ? (I am not always smartest one in the room)


139 posted on 05/20/2011 12:15:07 PM PDT by Just A Reader
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To: GSWarrior

I used my dogs name & couldn’t stop laughing. Thanks for the link!!


140 posted on 05/20/2011 12:17:37 PM PDT by stylecouncilor (What Would Jim Thompson Do?)
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