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%~%~THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD~%~%
Posted on 03/11/2011 4:57:51 AM PST by Lucky9teen
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And now for some cartoons:cartoons:
To: Lucky9teen
2
posted on
03/11/2011 4:58:59 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember.)
To: Monkey Face
3
posted on
03/11/2011 5:00:24 AM PST
by
CPOSharky
(After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF.)
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...
4
posted on
03/11/2011 5:00:45 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Jobs? Nope! Economy? Nope! Disarm the U.S? Yep! Impeach the treasonous Marxist Muslim usurper bast)
To: Lucky9teen
IBTP
TOP 5
TIGER BLOOD WINNER!
5
posted on
03/11/2011 5:01:16 AM PST
by
paulycy
(Islamo-Marxism is Evil.)
To: BabyBMW; Apple Blossom
6
posted on
03/11/2011 5:07:52 AM PST
by
bmwcyle
(It is Satan's fault)
To: Lucky9teen
To: Lucky9teen
HEADLINES FROM THE NEW YEAR : 2059
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia’s third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.
8
posted on
03/11/2011 5:09:43 AM PST
by
CPOSharky
(After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF.)
To: CPOSharky
Yepper! I was awake in time!! :o])
9
posted on
03/11/2011 5:11:08 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember.)
To: Monkey Face
Whole lot o’ shakin’ goin’ on...
10
posted on
03/11/2011 5:13:24 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(III%. The last line in the sand)
To: Dead Corpse
I saw that. I’d rather be in an earthquake than a tornado.
Just sayin’...
11
posted on
03/11/2011 5:14:55 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember.)
To: Lucky9teen
12
posted on
03/11/2011 5:20:05 AM PST
by
Izzy Dunne
(Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
To: Monkey Face
13
posted on
03/11/2011 5:23:40 AM PST
by
BenLurkin
(This post is not a statement of fact. It is merely a personal opinion -- or humor -- or both)
To: the_devils_advocate_666
14
posted on
03/11/2011 5:24:33 AM PST
by
BenLurkin
(This post is not a statement of fact. It is merely a personal opinion -- or humor -- or both)
To: Lucky9teen
A father walks into a restaurant with his young son. He gives the young boy 3 nickels to play with to keep him occupied. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The father realizes he boy has swallowed the nickels and starts slapping him on the back. The boy coughs up 2 of the nickels, but keeps choking.
Looking at his son, the father is panicking, shouting for help.
A well dressed, attractive and serious looking woman in a blue business suit and "don't touch me" tie, is sitting at the coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper and places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.
Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants, takes hold of the boy's testicles and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last nickel, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand and immediately pockets. Releasing the boy's testicles, she walks back to eat at the coffee bar without saying a word.
As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?"
"No", the woman replied. "I'm with the IRS."
OK...it's kind of a tool joke!!
15
posted on
03/11/2011 5:25:47 AM PST
by
Logic n' Reason
("Don't start coloring until you know where the lines go.")
To: Lucky9teen
16
posted on
03/11/2011 5:39:31 AM PST
by
JoeProBono
(A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
To: Lucky9teen
oh boy it’s Friday, top 20, thanks as usual!
To: BenLurkin
18
posted on
03/11/2011 5:43:13 AM PST
by
Arrowhead1952
(TX and MI - When the going gets tough, the dims run and hide.)
To: paulycy
19
posted on
03/11/2011 5:44:21 AM PST
by
JoeProBono
(A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
To: Izzy Dunne
20
posted on
03/11/2011 5:45:08 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember.)
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