Posted on 01/19/2011 9:20:11 AM PST by raccoonradio
There is no joy in Shillville — the “dynasty” got a bone in its throat for the sixth consecutive year.
It’s over. Now, please, can all of you jock-sniffers, cheerleaders, frontrunners and pom-pom boys just Get Over It and move on to the next overhyped sporting event.
I’ve got it — Beanpot Fever Sweeps Hub!
Oh, the inconsolable gloom that envelops Patsies Nation. I heard that on Sunday night after the stomping, some local loser issued this plaintive cry:
“My win-tah is spoiled!”
On Sunday, “we” were going to the Super Bowl. Then “they” lost.
Really, it would take a heart of stone not to laugh. But now it’s time to take the Patriots [team stats] flag down from your front door, and it’s way past time to get that Patriots spare-tire cover off the back of the SUV, not to mention to put away the Triple XL Brady No. 12 sweatshirts.
Most of all, it’s time for these overwrought, overweight yahoos to stop thinking quite so much about Tom Brady [stats]. There’s something not quite healthy about this obsession a certain class of males around here has for Mr. Gisele Bundchen.
Like, why do they hate the supermodel so much? Are they ... jealous? Some of these guys, when you hear them breathing heavily as they gush about Brady, you start thinking two words: restraining order.
The fellowship of the miserable, as Rick Pitino once described this sad collection, gravitates to two radio outlets: one appeals to 30-year-old men who live in their mom’s basement — the other to 50-year-old men who live in their mom’s basement.
Remember Brady’s fender-bender in the Back Bay in September. The basement boys reacted as if al-Qaeda had struck New York again. One of the room-temperature-IQ producers called 911. Like, it’s, like, Tom Brady, man, the greatest quarterback ever.
Host No. 1: I love Tom Brady more than you!
Host No. 2: No you don’t, I love Tom Brady much more than you do!
Host No. 1: Rah-rah-rah....
Host No. 2: ... sis-boom-bah.
The fans, the hosts — everybody sounds the same. Listen for two minutes and you’ll feel like you’re home on the range. Seldom is heard a discouraging word. There’s a bar right between the two stations, Hogan’s Run. If the two stations put up microphones at either end of the bar and let every Brighton boozer who wandered in just belch and burp to their heart’s content, no one listening in their car would ever notice any difference.
Hey, Brady, one last thing to think about in the offseason. A haircut.
Howie used my line about the 30 yr old and 50 yr old men living in mom’s basement! Of course Howie is getting pummeled in the comments on this. People need to realize it’s humor, at the expense of sports fans who need to be talked out of jumping out of windows of tall buildings when their team loses. OK a bit of an exaggeration.
Howie is a sports fan himself—at least he talks of watching NFL games or college basketball. But he’s not over-consumed by it, like the sports radio callers who boo-hoo over something like this. Hey, you like sports, great, you talk about what went wrong, etc. but there are some who take it too far.
It is kind of interesting though to note that the Patriots, at one time the hard luck Patsies, won a bunch of championships and are now regarded in much of the nation as the Yankees—with hate. Now it’s the Jets some may have sympathy for (not me necessarily) because of a championship drought. The last time they won it all, the Beatles were thinking of breaking up. That being said, Go Steelers.
(Part of that also comes from my admiration for that city the past few years, home of my cartoon fan convention. Yinz gonna watch the Stillers at a dahntahn bar an’ at?)
In the words of a great quarterback, “I wanna kish you! I couldn’t care less about the team strug-a-ling!” Well Broadway Joe they struggle no more in the game of FOOTball but you will no doubt expect New Englanders like me to be cheering for the Stillers... :)
Wasn’t it great when the Jets won it all last time? The fans were in the stands all singing a recent pop song: Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah, Hey Jude... :)
I guess it’s understandable that people in Massachusetts might root for the Patriots, but I’m baffled by folks in NY and NJ who have perfectly good teams to root for, but nevertheless are obsessed by the Patriots and/or Red Sox. I was so glad to see the Jets clean their clock.
The great part of being a fan in NY you have soooooo many choices available to you each season. /s
Same reason people in New England root for the NY teams....
relocation, you grew up with the team as your parents’ favorite, you sister is one of Cromartie’s baby mommas or your GF appeared in a Rex Ryan foot fetish movie.
Best 15 yards he'll ever spend! :-)
The Patsies haven't done so well in the playoffs since mean old Roger Goodell told them they couldn't steal their opponents’ signals anymore.
Say what you want about Rex Ryan, he has totally transformed the mindset of the Jet's organization, players, coaches and fans from nervous losers always expecting disaster and defeat to strike at any moment, to a bunch of arrogant bastards always expecting victory (and often getting it).
Normally, I'm not a huge fan of trash talk, but the Jets needed Rex and he makes the trash talk work.
After Rex wins 3 or 4 Super Bowls with the Jets, I think the right thing would be to send him to coach the Cleveland Browns, and then manage the Chicago Cubs. :-)
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