Frank Costanza: “Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.”
Cosmo Kramer: “What happened to the doll?”
Frank Costanza: “It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born: a Festivus for the rest of us!”
Kramer: “That must have been some kind of doll.”
Frank Costanza: “She was.”
Cosmo Kramer: “And is there a tree?”
Frank Costanza: “No, instead, there’s a pole. It requires no decoration. I find tinsel distracting.”
Frank Costanza: “It’s made from aluminum. Very high strength-to-weight ratio.”