Students Banned From Bringing Pencils To School

Slashdot ^ | 11/24/10 | samzenpus

[goldstategop]

Liberals are getting ridiculous... now pencils are weapons? They’ll have to ban keys next - sharp, pointy objects that can blind and maim.

[Fred Hayek]

Writing implements as weapons. I said this was coming, but considered it to be absurdly unlikely. Well, I was wrong. So what’s next? Nothing can be too absurd.

This is why I am single/no kids. Now the temptation would be too great to scream in the school administrator’s face “STUPID ****ING IDIOT”. It’s all namby pamby land.

[sheik yerbouty]

Oh great! Schools as penitentiaries..

[supremedoctrine]

All in-class homework or figuring will have to be done on
an Etch-a-Sketch.

[Drew68]

In other news, any teacher or administrator caught in possession of a working brain will be prosecuted for theft, since it obviously belongs to someone else.

To be fair, I believe most of these asinine "zero tolerance" policies have been enacted out of fear of lawsuits. You can bet the school would find themselves on the defensive should a kid get stabbed in the eye with a sharpened pencil.

Fear of litigation, job loss and budget-breaking settlements has taken the practice of "erring on the side of caution" to absurd levels.

[OneWingedShark]

I don't remember where I heard it, but this certainly fits:
"School is prison for those who have committed the crime of being born."

[Fred Hayek]

Or even thinking the word “gun” would get the kid in trouble.

Some of this political correctness crap started showing up in schools and college campuses in the seventies. It created a stifling environment where I always felt that I was in a minefield, and some idjit would get offended at the slightest word. Even showing some measure of intelligence or initiative was extremely risky.

[UCANSEE2]

No. Helen Keller’s favorite color is: CORDUROY !

[Myrddin]

The pen is mightier than the sword. Now pencils
are weapons. Next up...book bans. Bringing
material into class that doesn’t preach the
socialist agenda will be a crime.

[redshawk]

A revolution is brewing now and the foolish liberals will regret what they have done. (or are doing)

[UCANSEE2]

No more pencils, no more books,
No more teacher's dirty looks.
Kick the table, kick the chairs
Kick the teacher down the stairs!

[BobNative]

“Zero Tolerance” = NO BRAINS

[YHAOS]

Another reason for the separation of school and state.

[metmom]

Another thing to thank God for today.

That we still have the freedom to homeschool.

Just when you think you've heard it all, the public schools give you.....

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[visualops]

That’s why you just stab them in the neck or under the chin, to incapacitate enough to give you the upper hand.

[Bob]

Only challenge is that your subject is not likely to hold still while you get set up. :)

They don't have to be holding still if you can jab the point between their ribs and puncture a lung (or two). :=) While it may not kill them as quickly, it'll definitely take the fight out of them. (Just be sure to hold the pencil with the eraser in front of your pinky finger so that it doesn't slip through your fingers.)

[Billthedrill]

But what about paper cuts?

Too right. And then there are the deadly projectile weapons known as "spitballs". Paper clips launched from a rubber band can be deadly as well. Ban them all.

[CodeToad]

What a retarded person to do this.

[rdl6989]

Just when I think I’ve heard it all.

[Uncle Meat]

Reminds me of Butthead bouncing a pencil off the desk and it landing in Beavis’s eye and saying,”Whoa,that was cool!”