Columbia (University) Writing Professor Sends World's Haughtiest Email to Former Students

Gawker.com ^ | Hamilton Nolan

[Feline_AIDS]

Janette Turner Hospital is the author of Orpheus Lost and other books, and a professor at Columbia. She sent MFA students at her old school, the University of South Carolina, the following note about their inferiority. It is amazing.

Hospital sent this note to all of the MFA students on the University of South Carolina listserv. More than one of them forwarded it to us. "We're all enraged," one MFA grad from USC tells us. "She is nuts!" says another. Indeed. What's your favorite part? The personal revelations? The breathtaking undertone of insult towards those in South Carolina? Her special pet name for the Upper West Side? This is fertile ground.

From: "HOSPITAL, JANETTE"

Date: September 27, 2010 9:42:27 AM EDT

To: [Listserv]

Subject: News from a different MFA planet

To those I'm supervising and to all other MFA students:

[snipped for excerpting space]

As for news from this very different MFA planet, I'm in seventh heaven teaching here, and not only because I have Orhan Pamuk (whom I hope to bring to USC for Caught in the Creative Act), Oliver Sacks, Simon Schama, Richard Howard, Margo Jefferson, etc., etc., as colleagues, though that is obviously part of it.

My students also live and move and write in seventh heaven and in a fever of creative excitement. Columbia's MFA is rigorous and competitive but students don't just have publication as a goal – they take that for granted, since about half the graduating class has a book published or a publishing contract in hand by graduation – so they have their sights set on Pulitzers.

[Feline_AIDS]

Reason 982348782 to be careful about what you email.

[fieldmarshaldj]

"Janette Turner Hospital"

Isn't that where they sent Karl Childers ?

[Cu Roi]

Academics like this bring to mind Ambrose Bierce's definition of erudition: "Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull."

[Psycho_Bunny]

Haughty From Heaven.

[Batman11]

“Janette Turner Hospital”

I think some annoyed USC student should put this elitist a-hole in the Columbia Presbyterian Hospital!

[yetidog]

Back in the day, we used to call such folks “greenasses.”.

[billorites]

Lemmee guess.

Bitter, old, childless...

[fieldmarshaldj]

Aherm. I’m not that old.

[Gapplega]

hopefully you’re correct.

[Brucifer]

She’s an arrogant snot. She’s not much of a writer, but apparently she can type pretty good. I didn’t see one spelling error either.

[Tzimisce]

What do you expect? This woman is a lib.

[billorites]

"Aherm. I’m not that old."

mi scusi

[billorites]

She gets too hungry, for dinner at eight
She loves the theater, but doesn’t come late
She’d never bother, with those who don't rank
That’s why the lady is a skank

[Stormdog]

Another irrelevant ego taking up space at an over rated and over priced diploma mill.
Maybe she can get a job ghostwriting for another hyper inflated Columbia ego currently residing in the White House.

[PGR88]

As someone once said:

“Why are academics so political? Because there is so little at stake.”

[steve86]

the crackle of intellectual energy in the air is almost visible, like blue fire.

Wouldn't "like a blue flame" be superior?

[steve86]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Janette_Turner_Hospital

[Thrownatbirth]

Oliver Sacks, Simon Schama, Richard Howard, Margo Jefferson, etc.,

They're all probably mortified being in this dingbat's rant.

[ottbmare]

The comments were hilarious—and astute. Oh, boy, has this naive fool shot herself in the foot.

[Chode]

Janette from another planet...