Wife- "What’s this in the Enquirer?"
Tiger- "Er, um, those jeans sure do make you look FAT!"
Not a good way to start the day.
Sometime in the afternoon Tiger was sitting on the couch, in the living room.
His wife sits down next to him and asks "What on the TV?"
"Dust" he replied.
The wife fuming, from the earlier insensitive comment, storms off in a huff saying something about "Tiger sleeping outside until he becomes a little more domesticated".
Tiger puts a hand to forehead saying to himself "Geesh!"
They didn't speak to each other for the rest of the night. Tiger fell asleep on the couch and at 2 in the morning, heard the screech of a banchee and something about a "...G&)*&damn toilet down or up...!" realizing he committed a capital offense by leaving the toilet seat up, he rubbed his eyes and fumbled looking for his car keys.
Making a hasty retreat to the garage his wife cuts him off. She is breathing heavy, with her hair everywhere and stuff coming out of her eyes. Additionally, she is anxiously gripping a "9 Iron" and suddenly screams "What's with the car keys Mr. Can't do anything wrong? Hmmm?ac Going to see your harlot? Well, thanks for pointing out My Fat ass, which just took a dunk in a gold plated toilet".
Tiger laughed a little, nervously at first and because the whole thing was just funny .... and that is when she lost it.
That is all it took to turn on her Harpy voice and she screamed "You a Tiger? Humph!! I am the Lion and Queen of this jungle. I am in the mood to go hunting, game on!".
Then she started swinging.
A bit of a long story but that may be what happened.
Remember, behind every good looking woman is another man who can't put up with her crap anymore