Posted on 08/16/2010 9:15:33 AM PDT by CSM
Have you considered satisfaction with less things throughout life?
Despite being the most affluent generation the world has ever seen, 54% of Americans have saved less than $25,000 for retirement. We're sacrificing our retirement to support our lavish lifestyles—big houses, cars, boats, flat screens, you name it.
Few people can embrace the idea of cutting back their lifestyle and settling for the basics. But, if you're going to "do what rich people do," as Dave says, forget about impressing your neighbors. Instead of seeking satisfaction in what you buy, why not consider gaining satisfaction from a simpler lifestyle?
Proof That Simpler Lifestyles Work For more than 30 years, Dr. Thomas J. Stanley has studied the habits of wealthy people, revealing his findings in several books, including Stop Acting Rich and The Millionaire Mind. His groundbreaking research has uncovered the truth about the lifestyles of the wealthiest Americans.
Dr. Stanley posted a letter from "Mrs. C.C." on his blog, thomasjstanley.com. Mrs. C.C. has a net worth of more than $1 million, but she has never made more than $60,000 a year. "I have accumulated most of my net worth by living below my means," she said. "I have everything I want, but I have learned not to want too much."
In another letter, "D. Termined," who, at age 55, has a net worth of $2.4 million, describes his family's lifestyle. "I think I paid $67 for a pair of shoes once, and my watch is a Timex," D. Termined said. "My wife has shopped at thrift stores for many years and uses coupons extensively."
There are no granite countertops in his $200,000 house, which was paid off more than 10 years ago. Money saved on the house payments went into savings.
Mrs. T, who is also financially independent, gives 10% of her income to charity, put four kids through college without debt, shops at T.J. Maxx, and drives a Ford Taurus. She told Dr. Stanley, "I am extremely happy with my life."
"Here is yet another case to support my strong contention that satisfaction in life does not come from what you can buy in a store, but rather from the values, beliefs and behaviors that most wealthy people possess," Dr. Stanley concluded.
Finding Balance
While it is important to save and invest for the future, it is also okay to enjoy nice things. Denying yourself the pleasure of new gadgets when you can truly afford them is no healthier than buying gadgets you can't afford.
Some people will be compelled by fear to save more than they need to. Instead of spending money to feel good, they save money to feel good. But the effect is the same—you can never save enough money to feel totally secure if fear is driving you.
Wow! What do you do for a living?
They have already, years ago, been through one bankruptcy, so another one to them, wouldn't be a big deal. They will continue to spend, go on vacation, etc, until they absolutely get everything taken away.
They truly have developed a attitude of "we worked hard all our lives, and we deserve this". They figure since they can afford the bills today (paycheck to paycheck), tomorrow will take care of itself. Don't even get me started on what will happen when one of them eventually needs nursing care, but the other is still semi healthy, and realize in our state everything they own is an asset, before help can be gotten.
I assist the elderly and terminally ill. I take them to doctors visits, do their shopping, etc. Without a car, I couldn’t do my job. While I am recompensed for mileage, it doesn’t begin to make up for the wear and tear (or the gas)on the car.
Its legal to buy cars outright. I’ve seen it done. No payments, no interest, and you’d be surprised at the deals you can get when you’re not begging the car dealer for money.
SnakeDoc
When broached about the subject, she just says "It's not my fault", and brings on the tears. They actually do not have a problem dealing with the bills today, it's tomorrow I worry about. It just kind of Peeves me off that I work my butt off to provide for my family, but there are people out there like my parents who know someone else will take care of it down the line.
This is absolutely not an area which I would ever threaten my relationship with them over, we are in no way estranged over this, I am just venting a bit. And my husband knows the full situation, and will back me up in the end. Thanks again for the advice.
So what does that have to do with a car payment?
The plus-size section is especially good for that. Lots of yardage for the same price.
Yep. She gets 1 1/2 - 2 yards of silk at Goodwill for about $7. Cheaper than even fabric.com.
So what does that have to do with a car payment?
Do the best you can to make sure they're not actually in want. I'm helping mine out currently and it's tough, especially when you see them being irresponsible about money. Just remember, they're old and they're not going to change.
It's funny, my parents are both Grasshoppers (remember The Ant & the Grasshopper?) and we offspring are all Ants, because we've seen what Grasshopperdom leads to.
“As a rule ... don’t lend money. Give money, or don’t give money.”
Great point!
I just wish it wasn't self inflicted (ie, a little planning, on their part, and not as much instant gratification) and I probably wouldn't feel so resentful.
“Get by without a car payment?”
Yes.
“In my job, Einstein, one doesn’t get paid without having a vehicle.”
A distinctly different issue. In fact, if you are a “road warrior” then having a car payment is doubly bad for you. Why are you tying up your wealth in something that you destroy every year or two? Would you purchase a TV on credit and then smash it in 6 months? What is the difference?
Save up $6-8K and buy a good used car. You will find it is just as useful for you than one that has payments.
I had to help out a sister when she escaped from a battering husband, and she said that she would make a donation to charity when she got back on her feet, and I said "No! No! If you get on your feet enough to do that, I would like it back, but put me at the absolute bottom of your list."
No s*** Sherlock. How did this thread become one about car payments anyway? It was about the cost of living or trying to do so frugally. Add all the costs up, and it’s damn hard to get by even if you live within your means.
I **SO** know the feeling. Frex, mine are constantly getting cash from the ATM, but they can never say where the last cash went.
"It just got whittled away."
No. YOU opened your wallet, YOU took the money out, and YOU handed it to someone in exchange for SOMETHING. WHAT was it?
Of course I can't say any of this to them. I'm venting too.
You might want to take a look at this website:
www.cem.va.gov
Many people (my self included until I lost my mom) don't know that there are about 130 VA national cemeteries scattered throughout the US. (Although some of them are full.)
As long as your dad was discharged with “other then dishonorable”, the national cemeteries will provide a gravesite, the opening and closing of the gravesite, a gravesite marker, etc.etc., for both your dad and your mom. All at no cost to you.
It's all explained at the above website. And while it will not eliminate all of the expenses, like they say, every little bit helps.
If you are making payments on a car you aren’t living within your means. If you can’t buy it, you can’t afford it. I think that was the whole point of the other posters’ comments. People are trying to explain it to you but it is clear that you aren’t really on here looking for help.
What’s with the attitude? It’s unnecessary and very rude. If you don’t like csm’s answer then go else where for advice.
“How did this thread become one about car payments anyway?”
Well, let’s see.....
“It was about the cost of living or trying to do so frugally. Add all the costs up,...”
Yep, all the costs add up and a car payment is nothing but wasted money. So, you already knew the answer to your question.
Look, I am not going to be personally offended if you continue to make car payments. It is your money and you can make as many payments that you would like. However, if you want to be rich some day, then you need to have “rich people” habits. Rich people don’t make car payments, poor people do. You can decide which lifestyle you would like to adopt for your future lifestyle.
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