Nice story. We’ve been married 51+ years, sticking it out through good times and bad. A little stubborness helps so you don’t give up. And a little selflessness too. Catering to the other partner.
The priest who married us told each of us to give 90% to the marriage and to expect to get back 10%. If you both do that it should come out even. I think that he was right, although there was a guest at the Wedding luncheon who vociferously disagreed. She didn’t understand the lesson and was sure that it was some evil Catholic plot to make women do all the work. Her own marriage fell apart within 2 years.
In the 1970s a female cousin of mine said, after only a couple of years of marriage, that she was “madly in love with Jeff 80% of the time, indifferent about him 10% of the time, and hated his guts the last 10% of the time.” And although she was serious, she laughed about these percentages.
They’ve now been married for 34 years.
A healthy dose of realism helps a marriage last, and not expecting perfection. That gal that expected a perfect balance in matters — well, her marriage was no doubt doomed to failure.