Another one:
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THE PREACHER
A Preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger congregation
that will pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation, no one
wants him to leave.
Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the City stands up and proclaims, “If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda Mini-van to transport their children! The congregation sighs in relief, and applauds.
Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and investor, stands and says, “If the
Preacher will stay on here, I’ll personally double his salary, and also establish a foundation to guarantee the college education of all his children!”
More sighs and loud applause, Sadie Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, “If the Preacher stays, I will give him sex!”
There is total silence.
The Preacher, blushing, asks her,
“Mrs. Jones,whatever possessed you to say
that?”
Sadie’s 90 year old husband Jake is now trying to hide, holding his
forehead with the palm of his hand, and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies, “Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, “Screw the Preacher!”
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One day he drops letters in the Jones' mail box. The door quickly opens up and there is Mrs Jones looking stop the car and look hot in a neglige, wearing lots of perfume.
She invites Harry in. One thing leads to another and they are in bed.
After that, she takes him by the hand to her kitchen and makes the best breakfast Harry has ever eaten. Then she hands him a dollar.
Harry is not complaining but he is a little confused. "Mrs Jones, I've been delivering your mail for 10 years. Every day it is "Hi Harry, how's the family?" But today...today was really something "different". I don't under stand.
"Well," says Mrs Jones. "Last night I mentioned to my husband that today is your birthday. You are almost like family and I wanted to do something special for you. So I asked him what I should do for you. He said "F" him, give him a buck!!!" Breakfast was my idea."