[pigsmith]

"I can see the possibility of my death from my own device, but it wouldn’t be suicide. More likely a left out safety on my Trebuchet while trying to break a mile in distance."

News headline: "Trebuchet owner, dispairing to reach a mile in distance, ends it all by launching self"...

[thackney]

And sadly, I would miss my goal as my lard-butt would never travel as far a medium sized pumpkin.