[central_va]

Let me try an anology that even a brain dead idiot could understand:

A whore house(Federal Govt.) has a troublsome prostitute(South Carolina) that wants to leave and become a respectable human being(secession). Blocking the exit(Charleston Harbor) is a big fat idiot bouncer(Ft. Sumter). At first, she tries to negotiate(verified in the 2nd inaug) with the madam(Lincoln) for freedom. The prostitute, not intimidated, pushes(bombards) the bouncer out of the way.

[Non-Sequitur]

Let me try an anology that even a brain dead idiot could understand

Only a brain-dead idiot could come up with an asinine analogy like that. IMHO, of course.

Where's the part where the hooker owes the pimp for debts run up and where the hooker is trying to leave with property belonging to her and the pimp?