1st Annual FR Obama Limerick and Poetry Contest

PA Times | 3/15/10 | Pissant

[ReneeLynn]

Chicago style thugs
Socialism will save us
The true Obama

[massgopguy]

You whizzed on the electric fence, didn’t you?

[Bean Counter]

Start a fishy rumor ‘bout Hussein
And Rahm will get into your brain
You think Bush did some spying!
Or cheating and lying,
Chicago’s finest will drive you insane...

[Diogenesis]

We thought we knew the man named Obama ,
As the lib media said, “Don’t let the facts alarm ‘ya” ,
But once elected the undocumented paperless gent,
Showed America how his proterrorist heart was bent,
And now we are stuck with the man only confused with Osama.

[RikaStrom]

There once was a man who votes present
He wanted to be a uniter and president
He quoted “now is the time”
And look now on our dime
He’s ruining our country, the resident!

[sodpoodle]

There once was a Nation so free
That no-one believed it could be
Ever charmed by a toad
Or buy his full load
Of old timey, new slavery

[RikaStrom]

He came from the ACORN community
A man who gives terrorists immunity
He’s out of control
With an islamic soul
He’s taking control with impunity!

[444Flyer]

There once was a little Soetoro
Who changed his name into a Zero
His mother no 'Mommie'
His father a Commie
His mentors like Louis Calypso.

[RikaStrom]

He claims he came from Hawaii
But no birth certificate did we see
His background is Red
His mentors have all said
But he‘s the messiah and go down on a knee!

Ok, I have to go back to work now.

[Bean Counter]

As deep as they can possibly plow,
The Dhimmies seed Chairman Mao.
They just ignore his reason,
For slaughter each Season,
Few baby girls do ChiComms allow...

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

Nice one rika -

[xsmommy]

A+++ ; )

[AdamBomb]

His birth certificate is well hidden
Discussion of this is forbidden
They shot Donald Young…
…for what he did with his tongue
Now the Constitution will be overridden

[Lucky9teen]

Obama, Pelosi & Reid
Trifecta for power and greed
Trying to sugar coat
To get the vote
To grow their slavery seed

[mnehring]

The Obama (With apologies to Edgar Allen Poe)

Once upon a election dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten law,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a taxing,
As of some one gently taxing, taxing even my chamber door.
"'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "taxing even my chamber door- Only this, and nothing more."
Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,
And each separate deflating dollar wrought its ghost upon the books.
Eagerly I wished the morrow;- vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow- sorrow for the lost Autonomy -
For the rare and radiant freedom whom the founders name Autonomy -
Nameless here for eternity.
And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each unfunded bond
Thrilled me- filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating,
"'Tis some collector entreating, taxing, even my chamber door-
Some late collector entreating, taxing, even my chamber door;-
This it is, and nothing more."
Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
"Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came taxing,
And so faintly you came taxing, taxing even my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you"- here I opened wide the door;-
Darkness there, and nothing more.
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering,
fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Autonomy !"
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Autonomy !"-
Merely this, and nothing more.
Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a taxing somewhat faster than before.
"Surely," said I, "surely that is something at my window lattice:
Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore-
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;-
'Tis the collector and nothing more."
Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately Obama of the LBJ days of yore;
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door-
Perched upon a bust of Teddy just above my chamber door-
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.
Then this liberal prez beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore.
"Though thy hope be changed and deceived, thou," I said, "art sure no Obama,
Ghastly grim and ancient Obama wandering from the Nightly shore-
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!"
Quoth the Obama, "Capitalism No More."
Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly,
Though its answer little meaning- little relevancy bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was blest with seeing prez above his chamber door-
Prez or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door,
With such name as "Capitalism No More."
But the Obama, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only
That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour.
Nothing further then he uttered- not a feather then he fluttered-
Till I scarcely more than muttered, "other friends have flown before-
On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before."
Then the prez said, "Capitalism No More."
Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
"Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store,
Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster
Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore-
Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore
Of 'Never- Capitalism No More'."
But the Obama still beguiling all my fancy into smiling,
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of prez, and bust and door;
Then upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous prez of yore-
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous prez of yore
Meant in croaking "Capitalism No More."
This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core;
This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining
On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamplight gloated o'er,
But whose velvet violet lining with the lamplight gloating
o'er, He shall press, ah, Capitalism No More!
Then methought the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by Seraphim whose footfalls tinkled on the tufted floor.
"Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee- by these founders he hath sent thee
Respite- respite and nepenthe, from thy memories of Autonomy !
Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Autonomy !"
Quoth the Obama, "Capitalism No More."
"Socialist!" said I, "thing of evil!- prophet still, if prez or devil!-
Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted-
On this home by horror haunted- tell me truly, I implore-
Is there- is there balm in Gilead?- tell me- tell me, I implore!"
Quoth the Obama, "Capitalism No More."
"Socialist!" said I, "thing of evil- prophet still, if prez or devil!
By that Heaven that bends above us- by that God we both adore-
Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn,
It shall clasp a sainted freedom whom the founders name Autonomy -
Clasp a rare and radiant freedom whom the founders name Autonomy ."
Quoth the Obama, "Capitalism No More."
"Be that word our sign in parting, prez or fiend," I shrieked, upstarting-
"Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore!
Leave no law as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken!- quit the bust above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the Obama, "Capitalism No More."
And the Obama, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of LBJ just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming,
And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted- Capitalism No More!

[Pan_Yan]

I once felt a little bit sick
But Obamacare sure did the trick
They paid every fee
The surgery was free
Too bad they cut off my ...

[pissant]

Whoa!

[deadrock]

Gold.

[444Flyer]

You win!

[mnehring]

Still needs work, I noticed some continuity problems re-reading it.