Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Kids these days (incompetent and irresponsible adult children)
Boston Globe ^ | February 27, 2010 | Bella English

Posted on 02/28/2010 5:16:21 AM PST by reaganaut1

A lot of us have what is known as an “adult child.’’ It sounds like an oxymoron, but for those of us with offspring in their late teens and early 20s, the emphasis is more on the “child.’’

During the holidays, when my son (18) and daughter (23) were home, the house was full in most ways but empty in others. Empty tank of gas in the car. Empty roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. Empty pitcher of juice in the fridge. Out of fairness to my daughter, I should note that much of this was her brother’s doing.

Science says an 18-year-old’s brain isn’t fully developed. My own research bears this out. To wit: My son, despite my frequent reminders, forgot his contact lenses on a recent family trip to Peru. When we got there, after flying from Boston to Washington, Washington to Miami, Miami to Lima, and Lima to Arequipa - an 18-hour odyssey - we immediately had to find a drugstore and get the lenses. This was after my husband had contacted our son’s eye doctor, who had to fax a prescription there.

Spaciness, of course, extends to both genders. Take my daughter’s best friend, who was staying with us before flying out to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. About an hour before we were to leave for the airport, I heard a scream. “Oh my God, I’ve forgotten my money!’’

It was Sunday afternoon. No banks were open. Her parents live in another state. Worse, the group organizers in Africa required the money to be in $100 bills, none dated before the year 2000. You do not want to know how my husband managed to solve that dilemma in an hour. I’ll just say it was all legal.

(Excerpt) Read more at boston.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: adultchildren; spoiled; youngadults
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-40 next last
Obviously, parents should be teaching (and enforcing) good habits and life skills while their children are teenagers (and younger), so that adulthood does not come as a shock. The boomer parent author knows something is wrong but tries to reassure herself and her readers at the end:

"On the other hand, boomer parents have been good role models for our children in other ways, including a strong work ethic and social activism. Our kids tend to be confident achievers, thanks to our obsession with education and, yes, ego."

I wonder if she really believes that.

The comments at the Boston Globe site are interesting.

1 posted on 02/28/2010 5:16:21 AM PST by reaganaut1
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

...sounds like a little trip to Parris Island or Fort Benning is indicated for Junior. Send his lame ass into the military.


2 posted on 02/28/2010 5:18:14 AM PST by MSF BU (++)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1
... we immediately had to find a drugstore and get the lenses. This was after my husband had contacted our son’s eye doctor, who had to fax a prescription there.

You do not want to know how my husband managed to solve that dilemma in an hour. I’ll just say it was all legal.

Is it any surprise as to why these kids cannot act as adults? Their parents keep rescuing them.

3 posted on 02/28/2010 5:21:21 AM PST by pnh102 (Regarding liberalism, always attribute to malice what you think can be explained by stupidity. - Me)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

The writer gives herself away when she referred to her husband’s raising as “extreme” and said that he (her husband) and she both thought her husband’s father was “torturing” him. Good grief!!


4 posted on 02/28/2010 5:33:04 AM PST by chickadee
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1
I'm sorry, but hobnobbing around the globe, hiking Kilamanjaro and procuring c notes just seems like ... well .... your kids grew up (I assume) pretty much taken care of.

Why should they think ?

5 posted on 02/28/2010 5:34:38 AM PST by knarf (I say things that are true ... I have no proof ... but they're true)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pnh102
Is it any surprise as to why these kids cannot act as adults? Their parents keep rescuing them.

Bingo. And in this case, it wasn't even their own child to whom they were incapable of saying, "Well, I'm sorry. You'll just have to miss the trip."

6 posted on 02/28/2010 5:39:33 AM PST by Tax-chick (Cheeseburgers, parrots, volcanos, boats, rum, kittens, machine guns ...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: knarf

“...boomer parents have been good role models for our children in other ways, including a strong work ethic and social activism.”
So how do you accomplish either (except in a touchy-feely-self-esteem way) if you don’t know how to do anything?
No wonder the author’s children are ditzes.


7 posted on 02/28/2010 5:39:47 AM PST by Kanzan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: knarf

I agree. Response to the lack of $$, should be — Gosh, that’s too bad. Looks like you have an hour to figure that one out. If you can’t, I’ll make sure to share our pictures with you.

As long as Mom and Dad keep rescuing, Junior keeps learning, “Hey, I can count on parents to work out my problems.”


8 posted on 02/28/2010 5:40:55 AM PST by BelleAl
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: knarf

Good point I’m seeing that in my Grandkids.


9 posted on 02/28/2010 5:42:17 AM PST by Rappini ("Pro deo et Patria.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: BelleAl
"As long as Mom and Dad keep rescuing, Junior keeps learning, “Hey, I can count on parents to work out my problems.”

Which later in life translates to, "Hey, I can count on my government to work out my problems"

Way't'go, boomers ... good little drones y'got there.

10 posted on 02/28/2010 5:44:33 AM PST by knarf (I say things that are true ... I have no proof ... but they're true)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

***On the other hand, boomer parents have been good role models for our children in other ways, including a strong work ethic and social activism. Our kids tend to be confident achievers, thanks to our obsession with education and, yes, ego. But danged if they can fertilize the lawn.***

There is a reason God gave us two hands. One was for reaching out....the other one was for smacking sense into our offspring. This ditz will never get it!

Her whole essay was pompous bragging of world travel and affluence. She needs a good whupping as well as the kids she has so clearly neglected. They are simply accessories for her self-indulgent lifestyle.


11 posted on 02/28/2010 5:46:37 AM PST by sodpoodle (Despair - Man's surrender. Laughter - God's redemption.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: MSF BU

My daughter joined the Navy for a 4 year hitch. She was 19, fairly responsible, pretty independant.
I thought her gig in the Navy would make her more grown up, learn some skills, get some discipline.
Did not really happen that way. Boot camp doesn’t last forever, and the services are pretty soft now.
Most of the folks she met were drinking-not paying bills- breaking rules and getting away with it!


12 posted on 02/28/2010 5:54:49 AM PST by ronniesgal ( I miss George Bush. Hell, I miss Bill Clinton!!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: knarf

Great analogy. Quite the set up for total failure. Both as individuals and as a country.

We had a sermon series a few weeks ago about being responsible. The gist of it was that irresponsibility cannot be a neutral event. It always requires effort/money/time from someone else to clean up the mess. The irresponsible party just doesn’t see that.


13 posted on 02/28/2010 6:00:20 AM PST by BelleAl
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: BelleAl

Exactly. No contact lenses? Gee, guess you’ll be seeing Peru through your glasses. Same with the money. I’d buy the kid food and shelter, and that’s it. I think the problem is that kids don’t have to face the results of their own irresponsibility. If they didn’t get bailed out, they would be more careful.


14 posted on 02/28/2010 6:01:22 AM PST by GraceCoolidge
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: MSF BU
That was one unrecognized benefit to the draft. A lot of adolescents learned for the first time that the world may require them to do something they don't want to do, and daddy can't bail them out of it. Today, when the average age of video game players is 35, and the average number of years playing is 13, large numbers of idiot youts have no idea what it takes to keep all this in play and keep it going around.
15 posted on 02/28/2010 6:08:13 AM PST by hinckley buzzard
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

Liberal compassion is like a mother that carries her child everywhere never letting the child learn how to walk.

It should be viewed as child abuse.


16 posted on 02/28/2010 6:08:14 AM PST by listenhillary (the only reason government wants to be our provider is so it may become our master)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

I’m a failure as a parent. My kids leave all their stuff right where it drops — but — I can count on them to shovel the walk, mow the yard, help bale hay, plow the driveways for the grandparents and us, cook a meal and feed the cows if we need help.

It seems like BIG stuff will get them to deploy but regular everyday stuff causes the most arguments.

As for the contact lenses in the original story, I would have said “Too bad. Wear your glasses.” And, as for the friend who forgot her money, “Call your parents. Good luck.”


17 posted on 02/28/2010 6:10:28 AM PST by Cloverfarm (This too shall pass ...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: chickadee

The poor tortured man seems to have grown up fine and makes enough money for them to travel to everywhere in the world. Maybe they should torture their offspring the same way.


18 posted on 02/28/2010 6:42:56 AM PST by mortal19440
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Cloverfarm

What a witless article this is. It does seem to be bragging on how infantile their children are. I was just recently at my brother’s home and the difference between his kids (40s to 50s) and mine (teens to 30) are so striking. His kids are leeches and steal from them and use them. Mine have strong character and integrity, although they certainly aren’t perfect. I was shocked and dismayed at my nieces and nephews. They wonder that I don’t talk about my kids much to them. It’s because my kids would be shining stars next to theirs and I don’t want to embarrass them and brag. To me, my kids are normal.

Obama voters. snort.


19 posted on 02/28/2010 6:45:00 AM PST by Shimmer1 (tant que je vive)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 17 | View Replies]

To: reaganaut1

The author is delusional. Confident acheivers? These kids are garden variety, useless little pricks because of the enabling parents.


20 posted on 02/28/2010 6:46:24 AM PST by atc23
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-40 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson