We cause them when we set our Capitalist Destructor Beam to setting 7. On 3, it causes earthquakes like the one in Haiti.
When turned on and idling on 1, it causes election upsets like in Mass.
Setting 2 would cause Barney Frank to go straight and heal his lisping speech impediment.
When we set it to 10, Betelgeuse goes super-nova, and Nancy Pelosi leads the charge of impeachment against Obama.
Frowning takes 68 muscles.
Smiling takes 6.
Pulling this trigger takes 2.
I'm lazy.