Nicklaus is the golfer Tiger is chasing. Well Nicklaus took his wife and kids with him on tour, traveling in a station wagon for a few years. One of his US Open wins coincided with one of the kids' birthdays so they had the victory celebration at the local McDonald's. I think we can see which man is true to his family here.....
Tiger was in bed with another one. After he finished, he got up and started getting dressed. The lady looks up and says, Just once? Jack Nicholas never stopped at just one! So Tiger hops back in the sack and manages to do it again. Exhausted, he starts putting on his clothes.
Only two? On his worst day Jack Nicholas never stopped at two! Tiger picks up his cell phone and starts dialing.
Who are you calling? she asks. Tiger responds, Im calling Jack Nicholas. I want to find out whats par for this hole.