The sort of stuff you are bringing up needs to be verified in a handloading manual. .380 and 9mm use the same bullet so it's just a matter of velocity. The .357 Sig uses the same .355 bullet even though it says .357 in the name. A .357 bullet would most likely blow up the gun if fired in a .357 Sig. A 9mm and a .380 uses a .355 diameter bullet, but the 9mm is faster than a .38 special, so the 9mm can do more damage than a .357 size bullet going at a slower speed. OTOH, a .357 magnum goes faster than the 9mm, so it makes a BIG difference in damage.
The things to consider is the weight of the bullet vs the velocity of the bullet. A slow large bullet won't deform as much as a smaller faster bullet so the smaller faster bullet may do more damage than a slower heavier bullet. Most reloading manuals have a foot pounds chart in the back that will tell you the info you are seeking if you know the weight and speed of your cartridge.
Thanks, these are all great comments and discussions. I appreciate the feedback! :-)