No sex since 1955
A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event
hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of
extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom
approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.
‘Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is
something bothering you?’
Negative, ma’am. Just serious by nature. ‘
The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, ‘It
looks like you have seen a lot of action.’
‘Yes, ma’am, a lot of action.’
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said,
‘You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.’
The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally
the young lady said, ‘You know, I hope you don’t take this the wrong
way, but when was the last time you had sex?’
‘1955, ma’am.’
‘Well, there you are. No wonder you’re so serious. You really need to
chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to
a private room where she proceeded to ‘relax’ him several times.
Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and
said, ‘Wow, you sure didn’t forget much since 1955.’
The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his
watch, ‘I hope not; it’s only 2130 now.’
Subject: ~*~ Prayer For Leroy ~*~
Anyone with needs to be prayed over, come forward, to the front at the altar,” the Preacher says.
Leroy gets in line, and when it’s his turn, the preacher asks: “Leroy, what do you want me to pray about for you.”
Leroy replies: “Preacher, I need you to pray for my hearing.” The preacher puts one finger in Leroy’s ear, and he places the other hand on top of Leroy’s head and prays and prays and prays, he prays a blue streak for Leroy.
After a few minutes, the Preacher removes his hands, stands back and asks, “Leroy, how is your hearing now?”
Leroy says, “I don’t know, Reverend, it ain’t til next Wednesday!”
L0L!