It seems many people believe manners (and even ethics) is a sort of “prisoners dilemma” - It only is a benefit if every acts with manners. Otherwise, I, with my polite behavior, will suffer some loss in the face of another’s impolite/selfish behavior.
Actually, what should be taught is that the opposite is true - correct manners/politeness are a benefit for oneself all the time, regardless of another’s (or society’s) behavior.
My Daughter Teaches 5th Grade in PHX. She hass the class conduct themselves according to a credo of 11 words that she explains to the class at the start of of the year;
Trustworthy
Loyal
Helpful
Friendly
Courteous
Kind
Obediant
Cheerful
Thrity
Brave
Clean
and they line the walls.
If they sound familar they should as they are the first 11 Laws of the Scout Law.
Funny thing is even as a fisrt year teacher she has been praised for awell behaved class. And yes, her students know the Scout Sign and that when the Sign is Up that it means everyone is to be quiet; and they do it.
So there is hope.