- Did Letterman marry that man-partner of his in Massachusetts?
- Just wait until Letterman has to tell his son his mommy has a penis.
- Rosie O’Donnell bangs better looking dykes than Letterman.
Guest: Hey, Dave, I heard you got pulled over the other day.
Letterman: What, are you talking about, I didn’t get pulled over.
Guest: Yeah, your wife stuck her face out the window and they thought she was mooning people.