You said you saw it in their eyes? Is it like a sad stare? The reason I ask is that my kitty has cancer and I know its time. He has lost so much weight and he has large tumors all over him. He just lays on the rug and stares at the wall with a sad look on his face. Hes very depressed. The vet says he isn’t in pain but he doesn’t sleep, just stares at the wall with that sad look in his eyes. I know I should do the right thing but it hurts so bad. I just can’t bring myself to take his life.
My last cat, Motorola, did that, I would pick her up and carry her to her food dish and in a little while she was back by the wall. She just stared at the wall until she died. She had no known illness but she was old 14 or 15. I asked my vet (my brother) and he said her organs were shutting down.
My condolences to both of you. I play the tough guy around the house with the animals (get the cat off of my side of the bed, stupid dog waking me up, etc.). But, I love them both dearly. With the 14-year old dog it had cancer in his leg and we decided even though he was old he acted like a puppy, so we had them amputate his leg in the hope of getting another six month from him. (And like the vet said - that’s two years in dog years! That actually is what clinched the decision for me. LOL!) That was a year ago now! And he’s back to chasing squirrels!
The long-time cat, she knew it was time (feline lukemia). She couldn’t sleep, she would not face you, she would find places to hide and face into the wall - really strange behaviour. In the end she was having these “fits” of shaking, and couldn’t walk straight.
My wife wanted to wait as long as possible. I finally called the vet to make an appointment ASAP. It just wasn’t fair to the poor cat. It never meowed or cried in pain or whatever, but it had to be suffering. Or at least confused as to what was going on. Poor thing.
And, as tough as I pretend to be, I cried when we had to put her down as I held her. And I’ll no doubt do the same with our dog when its his time. Even if I do have to clean up a mess on the downstairs carpet that same day. (Stupid dog!) ;)
It’s not so much that you will be taking it, it is more that you are giving it back to the world to use again.
Whether it’s inspiration or infusion, life, when it runs high like sap in a spring tree finds its resolution through the long, slow trip home — giving memory to disappointment and experiencing joy in equal parts, and saving regret for another time.
If a person has a pet, one of them will find peace.
With grace they will embrace.