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To: ST.LOUIE1; Mama_Bear; Billie; DollyCali; dutchess; Aquamarine; GodBlessUSA; OESY; NicknamedBob; ...
January 26, 2009








Graphic, music and quotes by Billie

2,792 posted on 01/26/2009 8:07:26 AM PST by JustAmy (I wear red every Friday, but I support our Military everyday!!)
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To: JustAmy; yorkie; OESY; MEG33; jaycee; Mama_Bear; The Mayor; ST.LOUIE1; Billie; ConorMacNessa; ...



Don’t Mess With Old Ladies!

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding…

Older Woman:            Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer:    
                Ma’am, you were speeding.
Older Woman:    
       Oh, I see.
Officer:    
                Can I see your license please?
Older Woman:    
       I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.
Officer:    
                Don’t have one?
Older Woman:    
        Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer:    
                I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older    
                     Woman: I can’t do that.
Officer:    
                Why not?
Older Woman:    
       I stole this car.
Officer:    
                Stole it?
Older Woman:    
        Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer:    
                You what?
Older Woman:    
       His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
The Officer
  looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up.

Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2:                 Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman:    
        Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2:    
            One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman:    
       Murdered the owner?
Officer 2:    
            Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

                             -The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2:                  Is this your car, ma’am?
Older Woman:    
       Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2:    
            One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

                             -The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

                             -The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2:                 Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman:    
       Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Don’t Mess With Old Ladies!



2,825 posted on 01/26/2009 9:53:38 AM PST by Lady Jag (NOW MORE THAN EVER https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate)
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To: JustAmy; Billie; Lady Jag; All

2,833 posted on 01/26/2009 10:30:48 AM PST by yorkie (Grandmas are antique little girls)
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To: JustAmy

Girl just gotta have fun, thats the truth!

Love the graphic this morning and maybe I can learn something from the quotes....LOL~~~~!


2,841 posted on 01/26/2009 11:08:48 AM PST by jaycee
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To: Billie




Billie, thank you for today's fun Opener.

Wishing y ou a lovely Monday!


2,859 posted on 01/26/2009 12:41:18 PM PST by JustAmy (I wear red every Friday, but I support our Military everyday!!)
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