Procrastination is one thing I have been able to perfect.
Maybe you could improve on yours.
Read this, sign it, and return it to me whenever.
Procrastinator's Creed
1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.
2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.
3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.
4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.
5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.
6. I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.
7. I shall never forget that the probability of a miracle, though infinitely small, is not exactly zero.
8. If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.
9. I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
10. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first word, when I get around to it.
11. I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.
12. I know that the work cycle is not plan/start/finish, but is wait/plan/plan.
13. I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.
14. I will become a member of the ancient Order of Two-Headed Turtles (the Procrastinator's Society) if they ever get it organized.
Coffee filters …who knew!?
(And you can buy 1,000 at the Dollar Store for almost nothing.)
COFFEE FILTERS: Not just for making coffee....
1. Cover bowls or dishes when cooking in the microwave.
Coffee filters make excellent covers.
2. Clean windows and mirrors.
Coffee filters are lint-free so they'll leave windows sparkling.
3. Protect China.
Separate your good dishes by putting a coffee filter between each dish.
4. Filter broken cork from wine.
If you break the cork when opening a wine bottle, filter the wine through a coffee filter.
5. Protect a cast-iron skillet.
Place a coffee filter in the skillet to absorb moisture and prevent rust.
6. Apply shoe polish.
Ball up a lint-free coffee filter.
7. Recycle frying oil.
After frying, strain oil through a sieve lined with a coffee filter.
8. Weigh chopped foods.
Place chopped ingredients in a coffee filter on a kitchen scale.
9. Hold tacos.
Coffee filters make convenient wrappers for messy foods.
10. Stop the soil from leaking out of a plant pot.
Line a plant pot with a coffee filter to prevent the soil from going through the drainage holes.
11. Prevent a Popsicle from dripping.
Poke one or two holes as needed in a coffee filter.
12. Do you think we used expensive strips to wax eyebrows?
Use strips of coffee filters.
13. Put a few in a plate and put your fried bacon, french fries, chicken fingers, etc on them.
Soaks out all the grease.
14. Keep in the bathroom.
They make great “razor nick fixers.”
