Posted on 10/31/2008 5:47:32 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Checking in, but gotta go. Having a chili contest here at work today, and I gotta take my 3 bean, 2 meat salsa and beer chili to be entered.
Be back later........
*’Twas the night before elections*
*And all through the town*
*Tempers were flaring*
*Emotions all up and down!*
*I, in my bathrobe*
*With a cat in my lap*
*Had cut off the TV*
*Tired of political crap.
*When all of a sudden*
*There arose such a noise*
*I peered out of my window*
*Saw Obama and his boys*
*They had come for my wallet*
*They wanted my pay*
*To give to the others*
*Who had not worked a day!*
*He snatched up my money*
*And quick as a wink*
*Jumped back on his bandwagon*
*As I gagged from the stink*
*He then rallied his henchmen*
*Who were pulling his cart*
*I could tell they were out*
*To tear my country apart!*
*’ On Fannie, on Freddie, *
*On Biden and Ayers!*
*On Acorn, On Pelosi’*
*He screamed at the pairs!*
*They took off for his cause*
*And as he flew out of sight*
*I heard him laugh at the nation*
*Who wouldn’t stand up and fight!*
*So I leave you to think*
*On this one final note-*
*IF YOU DONT WANT SOCIALISM*
*GET OUT AND VOTE!!!!*
Notice to All Employees
As of November 5, 2008, when Obama is officially elected into office, our company will instill a few new policies which are in keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:
1. All salespeople will be pooling their sales and bonuses into a common pool that will be divided equally between all of you. This will serve to give those of you who are underachieving a “fair shake.”
2. All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst yourselves. This will help those who are “too busy for overtime” to reap the rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.
3. All top management will now be referred to as “the government.” We will not participate in this “pooling” experience because the law doesn’t apply to us.
4. The “government” will give eloquent speeches to all employees every week, encouraging it’s workers to continue to work hard “for the good of all.”
5. The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because it’s “good to spread the wealth.” Those of you who have underachieved will finally get an opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and had success will feel more “patriotic.”
6. The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks. Don’t feel bad, though, because President Obama will give you free health care, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free food stamps, and he’ll let you stay in your home for as long as you want even if you can’t pay your mortgage. If you appeal directly to our democrat congress, you might even get a free flat screen TV and a coupon for free haircuts (shouldn’t all Americans be entitled to nice looking hair?).
If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may want to rethink your vote on November 4th.
CUDOS!!
Raising taxes on the “rich” 5%, raises prices and brings out the axes. Only right that those who voted for the program, should reap the result.
Dear Fellow Business Owners:
As a business owner who employs 30 people, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barack Obama will be our next president, and that my taxes and fees will go up in a BIG way.
To compensate for these increases, I figure that the customer will have to see an increase in my fees to them of about 8-10%.
I will also have to lay off six of my employees. This really bothered me as I believe we are family here and didn’t know how to choose who will have to go. So, this is what I did. I strolled through the parking lot and found eight Obama bumper stickers on my employees’ cars. I have decided these folks will be the first to be laid off.
I can’t think of another fair way to approach this problem. If you have a better idea, let me know.
The Chosen One comes
Marx in a bright shiny suit
Freedom goes bye bye
Don’t forget, Republicans vote on the 4th, and Democrats on the 5th.
One hot running mate
and Yosemite Sam too
Either them or Marx
Halloween nightmare
I voted early today
But Mccain still sucks. < / haiku >
Ayers, Wright, Pelosi
Reid, Flager, Obama too
America gone
Halloween or April Fool's?
His poll is rising...
The One buys airtime
Nothing but recycled stuff
We’ve all heard before
The One buys airtime
We still don’t know who he is
Pray for the nation
Sitting on the side of the road waiting to catch speeding drivers, a state trooper sees a car puttering along at 22 mph. He thinks to himself, ‘This driver is as dangerous as a speeder!’ So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.
Approaching the car, he notices that there are five elderly ladies - two in the front seat and three in the back, wide-eyed and white as ghosts.
The driver, obviously confused, says to him, ‘Officer, I don’t understand, I was going the exact speed limit. What seems to be the problem?’
The trooper, trying to contain a chuckle, explains to her that 22 was the route number,not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.
‘But before you go, Ma’am, I have to ask, is everyone in this car OK?
These women seem awfully shaken.’
‘Oh, they’ll be all right in a minute, officer. We just got off Route 127.’
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