Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

To: Joe 6-pack; fanfan
About 20 years ago, I knew a guy who liked taking Lysol and a Zippo to burn the wings off of flies. Still quite drunk, he asked in a Steven Wright-ish manner, the question that we all were wondering: "What do ya call a fly after you burn off it's wings?"
I replied, "A walk? A flew?"

Here's a good brand:


Fanfan, if it pisses off the treehuggers, it's good enough to me.
MUAAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!
114 posted on 09/21/2008 3:42:17 PM PDT by RandallFlagg (Satisfaction was my sin)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 109 | View Replies ]


To: RandallFlagg; Monkey Face; Joe 6-pack

LOL!

You know it’s true.

;-D


115 posted on 09/21/2008 3:49:22 PM PDT by fanfan (SCC:Canadians have constitutional protection to all opinions, as long as they are based on the facts)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 114 | View Replies ]

To: RandallFlagg; Joe 6-pack; fanfan; AnAmericanMother

Too late to be of any assistance to you, fanfan, but as you’ve already learned, Benadryl or the generic equivalent is good to have on hand. As one of my dogs has an allergy to rabies vaccinations, and likely others as well, the vet has me dose her with 2 caplets 30 minutes before the shot, then 2 more every six or eight hours until maybe eighteen hours have passed. This dog is 47 lbs, and until this thread, I didn’t know it was so safe for dogs to take.

When it comes to yellowjacket nests, my usual method of discovery is by mowing over them. Now, I’d be perfectly happy to leave them alone if they’d return the favor, but what they actually do is declare jihad on me. If’n ya look real close, they’re wearing matted black beards and screaming in gutteral wee voices. Ne’ermind, you don’t wanna get that close to ‘em.

(Er, this is why I keep Benedryl handy during mowing season.)

Anyways, that’s excuse to get off the mower for a while, allowing them to chill out and the sun to set. I don’t wait till I need a light to relocate their hole in the ground, just till dusk, with ambient light in the sky.

Instead of some special, expensive chemical (not to detract from the methods of others), I use the tools I got. I creep up on the little bastages with a funnel, a cup of gas and a dab of dirt poised on the tip of the shovel. Plunge the funnel into the hole and pour in the gas, Maynard!

The gas pooled in the funnel takes a while to soak all the way into their tunnels. I like to imagine their little buggy screams of horror as
their wings melt [Clint-Eastwood-voice] cleeeeeeeeean off. [/Clint-Eastwood-voice]

(I told you I’m allergic, right?)

Soon’s the funnel’s drained into the hole, I tip the dirt over the deathpit and pat it down. Whatever survives the liquid fuel won’t survive the fumes, and now they’re neatly buried.

Like they never even existed.

Muahahahahahahahaha!


123 posted on 09/21/2008 7:09:26 PM PDT by Titan Magroyne ("Drill now drill hard drill often and give old Gaia a cigarette afterwards she deserves it." HerrBlu)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 114 | View Replies ]

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson