A man walked into a bar and ordered a martini, then another - then martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar.
After a couple hours of drinking martinis, he had filled up the jar. He put the top on it, left a nice tip and left. The Bartender scratched his head and asked the guy who had been sitting next to him “What in the world was that”?
The man laughed a little and said, “ The guy was already pissed at his wife, so when she sent him out to the store for just one jar of olives.....”
A woman walks into a bar, and orders a martini with a plum in it. She proceeds to drink several more.
BARTENDER: I’ve seen people drink martinis with all sorts of things in them, but never before has anyone ordered a plum in their martini.
WOMAN: Ever since I lost my cherry, I have been plum crazy!