I know your post is a joke, but is it really true that you have never paid a library fine for a late book? You’re kiddin’, right? That isn’t human. You obviously have no children.
I am a VERY organized single homeschooling mother of four. I could go on a weekend vacation on what I’ve paid out in library fines in my lifetime.
I have a 20 year old library fine that still prohibits me from getting a library card.
I got around my lack of a library card. I took each one of my kids to the library to get their card... then promptly confiscated it for my own use until the day they demanded it back. Then I would take the next youngest child.
I forget the reason for not paying the fine. I remember I was right and they were wrong. Other than that, I have forgetten the details.