Posted on 06/26/2008 12:29:04 PM PDT by rface
Difference between cats and dogs: Dogs think, "Wowee, these people feed me, play with me, give me toys, clean up my mess and make me very happy. They must be gods!" Cats think, "Wowee, these people feed me, play with me, give me toys, clean up my mess and make me very happy. I must be a god!"
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People who have cats really want a dog but haven't got the time to keep one. So they settle for a cat which is vastly inferior because you can't take it for walks, it wont bring anything back to you unless it killed it first, and it will never ever treat you with anything less than complete contempt.
It is well known, in fact that cats ARE dogs, in spite of what those silly, left-wing inspired dictionaries, naturalists, scientists, and pet owners claim. We at Conservapedia face an uphill battle undoing several centuries of leftwing brainwashing that attempts to sell the notion that these domesticated, four-legged mammal carnivores are different animals entirely, and as soon as I find some scientists and naturalists who agree with me, I'll be sure to post them as cites. Honest. Cross my heart and hope to die.
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People who have dogs are emotionally insecure individuals who need the validation of constant, interminable, unremitting, unconditional affection, affection, affection. That is why Walt Whitman wrote:
I think I could turn and live with cats, they are so placid and self-contain’d I stand and look at them long and long. They do not sweat and whine about their condition; They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins; Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago; Not one is respectable or industrious over the whole earth.
Also, dogs slobber.
Well, cats do, too, but at least cats have the courtesy to spread it thinly and discreetly all over their body in a dignified way, where it dries out and becomes invisible except for adding that subtle gloss to their coat.
Unlike our Newfoundland who flings great stringy arcs of slobber all over the house, leaving big dried strings of Newfie spittle on the couch, the television set, and as high as five feet up on our walls.
Cats have many uses of which I'll name just a few.
Cats can be: -Made into violin or racquet strings
-Eaten in fine foreign cuisine
-Taunted for amusement with yarn, feathers and the like
-Dropped upside-down from very high places, only to land rightside-up
-Made into effective scapegoats of superstitious belief
-Killed eight times and emerge unscathed
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From this short list, surely everyone can begin to see just how useful cats truly are!
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Cats are subtle, devious and very very egocentric. Cats treat humans as if they were other cats, whereas dogs attempt to become human. Cats will come to you to be stroked, but if you don't do it right, or they tire of you, you may find that you are suddenly grabbed by claws or teeth. It's what a cat would do to another cat (on friendly terms) to say 'ok, thats enough'. I have known cats to walk into a room, lie on a chair, and when asked to move pretend to be asleep, then behave as if they have been there for hours. Soem cats will even argue with you visibly and vocally. If you understand cat intelligence, you are in a world of subtlety, arrogance and individual need. It's like having the most determined and self-assured three year old imaginable.....
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I've got 3 cats. I know better than that!
LOL. They have one eye open at all times....don’t let them fool you.
sorry, but it is just a joke, no sick man here, nor am I hyper-sensitive...
My old Siamese was expert at this, would leap vertically a good 4' to snag stuff. Crazy cat (we named him Loco) did not care about reentry, often crashed and burned coming back down.
The young Siamese we have now does not seem to think in 3 dimensions, might be due to his crossed eyes (very Siamese). He is improving though, knows I will often throw his mice over his head. He might start snagging them before long.
It’s called an invisible fence system. It works. They can roam the whole yard, climb trees, etc, andywhere within the perimeter of the cable around the yard.
You can train a cat. For example you can train a cat to become an indoor cat again. If you are a pushover to your animals, they will train you to behave the way they want you to. If he cries and you finally let him out, he’s trained you to let him out if he cries long enough. You stick him in a cage in the basement when he starts crying, and eventually the cat realizes crying will not get him what he wants, and he stops crying. He may try something else, but he learns crying will not get him outside.
Would you do that to a dog?? Keep it inside against it’s will? It will get fat and depressed.
Try telling my dog he’s not one of my boys.
People overfeed their pets anyways, but that’s not the point. I can’t tell you how many people come in to my vet with overweight animals.
And I could probably train a dog a lot quicker than a cat. Dogs being pack animals, and if they understand their place in the pack, you being the alpha dog, will be able to train him and correct unwanted behavior.
Now Joe, you can train a cat:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vja83KLQXZs&NR=1
Ok, it’s not a Sch 3 routine, but hey.
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