MORFORD: 10 ways to blow your tax rebate

You've been continuously mugged and beaten and robbed blind for the past seven years straight, and as you lay there on the cold, hard economic ground, bleeding and gasping and wondering what the hell happened to your vacation time and your health care plan and your mortgage payment, your attackers scoff and leer and toss a couple of bloodstained nickels on your pulverized face and mutter, here sucker, have some bus fare, and then they cackle and stomp away with all your loot and dignity and hope, back to the White House from whence they came.

Miss Morford appears to consider that income taxes started with Bush. Sorry, kiddo, it's been a lot longer than that and it helps pay for, say, AIDS research. Nudge, nudge.

That aside, this is a fascinating column if one reads between the lines a little (latex gloves recommended). Considering who Miss Morford is currently sneering at it would appear that he is - gasp! - growing old. That's right. "Them dang kids in their iPods and their Stoli and their GTA-IV. Why, in my day all we had was a quarter Ms Pac-man down at the bath-house!" I'm feelin' fer ya, Markie, but I just can't reach ya. Thank God.

Read it again and enjoy what's really going on here. Morford is sounding like your Uncle Fudd trying to do hip-hop. It's painful. It's embarrassing. It's fun.

You've been continuously mugged and beaten and robbed blind for the past seven years straight,

That's funny... For a second I thought that he was talking about paying taxes, which is how I'm being "mugged and beaten and robbed blind."

I should have known better.

Mark

Don't know about that brand but a tankless hot water heater is wonderful.

You get all the hot water you want when you want it but you aren't continually heating 40 gallons of water all the time so your gas bill goes down.

If you get the bigger unit you can run the washer, the dishwasher and take a hot shower all at the same time.

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