And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Now, the first was the wife of the deacon of Dover,
And though it was known she’s a bit of a rover,
She liked it so much she thought she’d stay over,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the next was an athletic lady named Myrtle,
She jumped o’er the top like a steeple chase hurdle,
Her glasses got caught in the stay of her girdle,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the next was a lady, Elizabeth Bender,
Was doing all right till a vagrant suspender,
Got all tangled up in her feminine gender,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the next was a lady named Jennifer Kim,
She’d just settled in on a personal whim,
Somehow she got hers caught ‘tween the cup and the brim,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the next to go in was old Mrs. Shuster,
She sat on the handle and thought someone goosed her,
She said, Oh, my dear, it don’t feel like it used to,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the next was the Bishop of Chichester’s daughter,
She wanted to pass some superfluous water,
She pulled on a chain and the rising tide caught her,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in the lavat’ry;
They were there from Sunday to Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Well, the last was a lady sweet Nellie Pumphrey,
She settled right in and she made herself comfy,
Somehow she found out she could not get her bum free,
And nobody knew she was there.
And it’s oh dear what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies locked in our lavat’ry
They were there from sunday to saturday
Nobody knew they were there!
Cheers for that!