The Official Friday Silliness Thread
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Top3
Thanks for the ping!
Ooh. A Maine Coon.
DEER MEAT
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner.
Both he and his wife decide that they won’t tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.
The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.
Well, he said, ‘It’s what mommy calls me sometimes’.
The little girl screams to her brother:
‘Don’t eat it, it’s an a##hole..
1. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger, and then it
hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare center where a three-year-old was
resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all
right now.
4. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s Round Table was Sir Cumference.
5. The butcher backed up into a meat grinder and got a little behind in his
work.
6. Writing with a broken pencil is pointless.
7. While fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
8. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at
large.
9. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
10. A thief, who fell and broke his leg in wet cement, became a hardened
criminal.
11. Can thieves who steal corn from a garden be charged with stalking?
12. We’ll never run out of math tea chers because they all know how to multiply.
13. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
14. The professor discovered that his theory of earthquakes was on shaky
ground.
15. All the dead batteries were distributed free of charge.
16. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
17. A bicycle can’t stand alone becaused it is two tired.
Barry says: "Hello there."
The only problem is that John is quite fat and keeps gaining weight.
"I'm so sad", John says. "I want to marry her and she says not until I lose weight."
"Well", I say. "I guess you can't have your cake and Edith too!"
Had to change into the right clothes...
