[Stoat]

Maurice Hollyfield told a court he wasn't paying attention because he had his stereo turned up loud so he could hear the music.

Just taking a wild guess here....either bagpipe music or the Rezillos?

A doctor told the court Hollyfield was fit to drive

Perhaps the doc viewed Mr. Hollyfield as a divine instrument of jihad to work Allah's will upon Scotland's roads?

UK Muslim medical students get picky (deciding that some topics in medicine conflict with Islam)

[Stoat]

Half-blind, deaf Scottish speeders ping

[DManA]

rev counter - is that what they call a tach? Cute.

[FormerACLUmember]

“Officer, could you hold my whiskey bottle while I look for my license?”

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

I believe the old man but he still should have to pay a fine.

50 on a tach and only 88 mph.
How do you get this car out of 2nd gear?

[NonValueAdded]

I just think it is nice to know they still use mph instead of kph like the rest of the Euroweenies. Or did the author do the conversion for us so we dumb continentals could understand it?

[llevrok]

"Aye the Bay Citah Rrrollers!!"

[mikrofon]

Scotland: One-Eyed Deaf Driver, 82, Tows Trailer At 88mph (Says he thought tach was speedo)

At least he wasn't a half-blind, deaf 82-year old Scotsman doing 88mph in a speedo...

[#1CTYankee]

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer see's a car puttering along at 22 MPH.

He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the front seat and three in the back, wide eyed and white as ghosts.

The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?" "Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly.

The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit.

A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.

"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time," the officer asks.

"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 142."

Old I know, and Corny too!

[Professional]

I’m pretty used to seeing folks on 1-5 driving way too fast with trailers, boats, uhauls etc. I get a real kick when they lose control and start whipping around all over the road. Eventually, most gather control, realize that excessive speed might kill them or others..... I always wonder if they peed themselves.