Mission accomplished!
One night , after couple had retired for
the night, the woman became aware that her husband
was touching her in a most unusual manner. He
started by running his hand across her shoulders and
the small of her back. He ran his hand over her
breasts, touching them very lightly. Then, he
proceeded to run his hand gently down her side,
sliding his hand over her stomach, and then down the
other side to a point below her waist. He continued
on, gently feeling her hips, first one side and then
the other. His hand ran further down the outside of
her thighs. His gentle probing then started up the
inside of her left thigh, stopped and then returned
to do the same to her right thigh.
By this time the woman was becoming aroused
and she squirmed a little to better position
herself. The man stopped abruptly and rolled over to his side of the bed.
“Why are you stopping darling?” she whispered.
He whispered back, “ I found the remote!”
During his sermon one Sunday, the local preacher told his congregation that the entire range of human experience could be found in the Bible.
He confidently stated, “If anything can happen to humans, it is described somewhere in the Bible.”
After the service, a woman came up to the preacher and said, “Reverend, I don’t think the Bible mentions anything about PMS.”
The preacher told the woman he was certain he could find a reference to PMS somewhere in Scripture. During the following week, he searched
diligently, book- by-book, chapter-by-chapter and verse-by-verse.
On the following Sunday, the woman came up to him and asked, “Did you find any references to PMS in The Bible?”
The preacher smiled, opened his Bible and began to read, “... And Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Bethlehem.”