It was sadder than I ever expected even though he was 11 and very sick. I am sorry for your loss.
I know exactly what you’re going through. I hope you’re burden has lessened over time.
I keep second guessing myself. I wonder if I should have made the vet try to save him. Then I remember how sick he was and believe I made the right choice.
The real problem is I want my cat back.
Now I have to go deal with this blurry screen :*(
It certainly does lessen over time. We have his picture up and still think of him very fondly. We actually (don’t flame me for this, people) let my son’s female cat have a litter of beautiful kittens before we fixed her, and we got great homes for three and kept one. It never replaces your old beloved companion but it’s a very pleasant distraction to open your home to another furry friend. Heal well. Mourning is no sign of weakness.