Pirate Master; Season Premier

Join 16 modern-day pirates as they embark on a high seas adventure around the Caribbean island of Dominica in search of hidden treasure that will total $1 million. Over the course of 33 days, the pirates will live aboard a massive 179-foot pirate ship.

Each week, these buccaneers will go on extraordinary expeditions and decipher clues along the way. Gold coins - real money that the pirates can take with them beyond the show - will be awarded after each treasure hunt, but only to some. The prized gold will then play a key role as pirates strike deals with each other and vie for long-term security.

Claiming the lion's share of the week's riches, one pirate will become the captain of the ship and will assign roles and chores to the remaining crew members, setting the tone for law and order or betrayal and sabotage, which could lead to mutiny by the crew. Such fates will be decided on the ship at Pirate's Court, a lively gathering of public speaking and judgment where one individual will be "cut adrift" every episode.

In the end, captain or not, only one pirate will win the largest booty, worth $500,000, and claim the title of "Pirate Master."

ARGH!!! Here be yer cast for Pirate Master! An a sorry, flea bitten, lice infested, scurvy lot they are indeed!

Alexis Shubin, Age - 26,
Fashion Publicist, Laguna Beach, CA.

Online Bio
Alexis Shubin was born in Fountain Valley, CA, and raised primarily in Laguna Hills, in South Orange County. While in high school, she was on the swim team and played water polo for four years. She then received her bachelor's degree in Communications/English from the University of Arizona in Tucson, where she was also an All-American water polo player. Alexis previously worked as an assistant editor for Lemonade magazine, Lucky magazine and Harper's Bazaar magazine-she says, "Think Devil Wears Prada." She is now a fashion publicist. She enjoys swimming, surfing and playing water polo. Her hobbies also include shopping and reading tabloids. Alexis describes herself as intimidating, animated and emotional. She has one brother, Grant. She currently resides in Laguna Beach, CA. Her birth date is July 14, 1980.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! She wants us ta think “Devil Wears Prada”???? Right! Just what we need aboard a Pirate Ship! A fashion diva to tell us what scarf to wear while pillaging and plundering.

Azmyth Kaminski, Age – 26
Music Producer, Los Angeles, CA

Online Bio
Born in Mt. Vernon, WA, Azmyth Kaminski later moved to Snohomish, WA. He attended some college at Cornish College of the Arts in Seattle. He is currently a disc jockey and entrepreneur, "constantly looking for new ways to create an abundance of passive incomes," he says. Azmyth describes himself as an artist by training that endeavors in interior design, architecture, fashion, the fine arts and music. He is currently searching for a warehouse space to build a club and business center for the art community in the Los Angeles area. He has previously worked in event promotion, fashion design and architectural construction. He enjoys snowboarding, building props, yoga, spinning fire and playing the drums. He considers himself energetic and humorous and says that he can work well with others, is a creative thinker, a hard worker and good at obstacle courses and problem-solving. Azmyth is also very proud of the fact that he was cast as an extra in "Pirates of the Caribbean 3," where he was hung in the first three minutes of the movie. The hardest thing he has had to overcome was a 15-day fast. He has been to 45 of the 50 States in America and is currently married, although his wife, Tang Tao, lives in Thailand at the moment-he met her while he living in Ko Panang working as a disc jockey. He has lived in the Los Angeles area for the last four years. He has one cat, Cinnamon, and two snails, Oogey and Ooget. His birth date is Dec. 12, 1980.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! Methinks his parents was smokin’ the wacky stuff when they named their son Azmyth! And if he only lasted 3 minutes as a pirate in “Pirates of the Caribbean – 3” what makes him think he’s gonna last any longer in Pirate Master?

Ben Fagan, Age – 23,
Musician, Charleston, SC.

Online Bio
Born in Boston, MA, Ben Fagan moved when he was six months old and was raised in Folly Beach, SC, near Charleston. In high school, he participated in junior varsity basketball and varsity football. He just graduated from the University of South Carolina in Columbia with a double major in business administration and marketing management, and a minor in Spanish. He is a member of Phi Beta Kappa. He is an avid surfer, performs in two bands and has a black belt in kung fu, acquired at the age of 12. He has also taught kung fu. He was previously the owner/operator of a small landscaping company. He describes himself as driven, charismatic and open-minded. He says he is driven by two things: music and the ocean. He enjoys swimming, running, lifting weights, biking, basketball and anything related to water-sports. He has three brothers and one dog, Austen, a black lab mix. He currently resides in Charleston, SC. His birth date is Feb. 28, 1984.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! We could always use another hand ta swab the decks! And if he gets out of line, we can use his scurvy hide ta scrape the barnacles off the hull! Cuz that’s about all he’s good for! Har! Har! Har!

Cheryl Kosewicz, Age – 35,
District Attorney, Sparks, NV

Online Bio
Cheryl Kosewicz was born and raised on a 22-acre farm in Grand Couler, WA, where she and her family literally lived off the land-their only store purchases were paper products. Growing up, she would fish, hunt, garden, sew her own clothes, work with animals and make things for the farm. She began participating in rodeo at a young age, competing in barrel-racing, pole-bending, goat-tying, roping and calf-riding. Her father then turned her on to basketball and she discovered her true love. During high school, she played basketball, and ran in track and cross-country. She was also class president and graduated as a valedictorian. Cheryl received her bachelor's degree in English from the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, where she was on the dean's list, on a basketball scholarship and continued on for her master's degree. She then attended law school at Northwestern School of Law in Portland, where she received her Doctorate of Law. She worked as a deputy district attorney in Las Vegas for six and a half years. She is currently a Deputy District Attorney in Reno, NV, focusing on the prosecution of sexual abuse cases. Cheryl regularly goes to the gym, runs, skis and swims. She also enjoys reading, horseback riding and athletic events. She describes herself as confident, athletic, competitive and loud. She currently resides in Sparks, NV. Her birth date is Nov. 11, 1971.

Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! A lass what can handle her own! Remind me to never run afoul of the law in Nevada!

Christa DeAngelo, Age – 29,
Ex-Military, Tamaqua, PA

Online Bio
Christa DeAngelo was born in Tamaqua, PA, and grew up playing a lot of sports. While in high school, she scored over 1,000 points and is still on her school's All Time High Scorer's List. She then moved to New York to attend St. Francis College in Brooklyn and then Alvernia College in Reading, PA. DeAngelo later joined the army on a whim and worked as an administrative assistant. She was selected to play on the All-Army Basketball Team and traveled the country playing college, professional and other armed forces teams. While stationed in Hawaii, she had her daughter, Iris, and completed her military service. She then received her bachelor degree in social psychology from Park University, MO and did some graduate work at Seton Hall. She hopes to get a Ph. D. in cultural anthropology. After her divorce, DeAngelo lost 70 pounds by jumping rope for up to four hours a day. She won the title of Miss Hawaiian Tropic 2005. She enjoys working out, basketball and hiking, and describes herself as engaging, hilarious and self-centered. She has been a featured extra on "The Sopranos," "The Knights of Prosperity" and a new film titled "The Tourist." DeAngelo currently resides in a small farmhouse in Tamaqua, PA, with her five-year-old daughter, Iris. Her birth date is July 18, 1977.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! Whats with her “Occupation” being listed as Ex-Military. Sounds like political correctspeak for currently unemployed. Oh well, we can always use another hand ta swab the decks & muck out the bilge!

Christian, Okoye, Age – 45,
Former NFL Player, Rancho Cucamonga, CA

Online Bio
Christian Okoye was born in Enugu, Nigeria, and came to the United States to attend college. He received his bachelor's degree from Azusa Pacific University in athletic training and physical education. He then joined the NFL and played professional football for the Kansas City Chiefs, where he led the NFL in rushing yards for the 1989-1990 football season. Since retiring, he's founded the Christian Okoye Foundation, a charity organization whose primary mission is to capture the passion children have for sports and direct that energy to enhance their educational and personal goals. His foundation draws at-risk and underprivileged youth by hosting free athletic clinics, where well-known professional athletes coach the kids. He also has a health and fitness business that primarily sells protein powders and multivitamins. He describes himself as very competitive, friendly and strong-minded. He enjoys jogging, lifting weights, golf, movies and travel. Okoye currently resides in Rancho Cucamonga, CA. He has two children, Tiana (15) and Kosi (2). His birth date is Aug. 16, 1961.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! Sounds like Christian is having a “Mid-Life Crisis” and instead of a snazzy red sports car, he’s opting for another 15 minutes in the spotlight. Hope he does well, but I’ll be keeping my good eye on him.

Jay Hatkow, Age – 37,
Automotive Parts Salesman, Detroit, MI

Online Bio
Born and raised in Detroit, Jay Hatkow has worked in the auto industry his entire life. His father is a union representative and when Jay graduated high school he began work as an auto-line assembler. He has also worked as a marketing manager and manufacturing engineer. Taking advantage of the car company's college tuition program, he enrolled in community college and then transferred, eventually receiving his Bachelor of Science degree in mechanical engineering from Michigan State University. He currently sells equipment for engine and powertrain test cells. His hobbies include playing online "Survivor" (a game he claims he always wins), Texas Hold 'Em poker, fantasy football, racquetball, boxing and lifting weights. Jay describes himself as devious, jealous and impatient. He says he can be manipulative and motivational, when necessary. He is very proud of the fact that he is the first person in his family to graduate from college. He is also very proud to be Polish-Italian. His most recent vacation was his second honeymoon in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, about nine years ago. He currently resides in Plymouth, MI, with his wife of 11 years, Denise, and their two children, Jeani (10) and Anthony (8), along with their dog, Stoli. Jay's birth date is Sept. 23, 1969.
Capt’ Cuz says: As the old saying goes, “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer!” I would have Jay as me second in command, just so I know where he is at all times!

Joe Don “J.D.” Norton, Age – 36,
Smokejumper, Fairbanks, AK

Online Bio
Joe Don “J.D.” Norton was born and raised by his mother and two sisters, one of which is deaf, in Scottsdale, Arizona. He played football throughout high school and then attended college for two years at Scottsdale Community College. At 20, he took off to Alaska to pursue a job in the fishing industry. He spent the summer working in canneries and on a fishing boat. He then decided to join the United States Navy and successfully trained at the Search and Rescue Swimmer School. Shortly after he finished his Navy service, he saw a documentary on smokejumpers and that's all he needed to see. He attended smoke-jumping school in Redding, CA, with the United States Forest Service and then transferred back to Alaska. He then bought 10 acres of land in Alaska and built a cabin, where he currently resides with his black lab, Anna. He describes himself as free-spirited, funny and big-hearted. His favorite sports are foursquare, dog-mushing, two-man sand volleyball, bodysurfing and swimming in the ocean. J.D. was originally chosen for "Survivor: Guatemala" and managed to break his ankle a couple of weeks before he was scheduled to leave. He currently resides in Fairbanks, AK. His birth date is Aug. 4, 1970.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! J.D. seems to be the “lovable, big ‘ol lug” type that’s about a “half a bubble off plumb”. Still, he might be a good one to keep around, just in case the crew tries to mutiny!

John Lakness, Age – 25,
Scientist/Chippendale Dancer, Carlisle, MA

Online Bio
John Lakness is a self-described "unapologetic nerd" who taught himself to program computers while in grade school, which got him into plenty of trouble with "hacking, cracking and anarchy." As a professional engineer and scientist, he studied physics at the Air Force Academy in Colorado, received his bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering from Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute and studied materials science at MIT (Massachusetts Institute of Technology). A scientist by day, he is a lead Chippendale Dancer at night. Although his brain is full of science, entertaining fills his heart. Lakness describes himself as Tarzan dressed in a tuxedo to entertain at a dinner party. He loves to see a smile from every woman in the audience, which motivates him to stay in excellent shape and practice several professionally-choreographed dance routines. A consummate athlete, John takes any physical challenge he can find as a way to stay fit: wrestling, running, swimming and a refusal to drive when cycling is at all possible. He says that if he wins PIRATE MASTER, his first selfish purchase will be a vainglorious billboard in the runner-up's hometown. He currently resides in Carlisle, MA, with his dog, Machiavelli. His birth date is March 23, 1982.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! This is the type what gives Pirates a bad name! “Professionally-Choreographed Dance Routines?” Just how much “professional training” does it take to rip your cloths off and grind your pelvis in women’s faces?

Jocelyn “Joy” McElveen, Age – 21,
Receptionist, West Columbia, SC

Online Bio
Born and raised in West Columbia, S.C., Jocelyn "Joy" McElveen has always been a tomboy even though she has also competed in beauty pageants. Her mother raised her alone while also serving in the South Carolina Army National Guard during the Gulf War. McElveen played basketball for 13 years and was chosen to represent the United States in Italy on the People To People Sports Ambassador Team while she was in high school and is proud to report she brought back the gold. She was in JROTC, honor's choir, varsity basketball and varsity track all four years of high school. Joy was also a student body president and a member of the National Honor Society. At 19, she made history in South Carolina for being the first African-American to win the Miss Sun Fun USA crown. She attended the University of South Carolina at Aiken for two years before moving to New York to attend Lehman Performing Arts College for one year. Her hobbies include basketball, singing, board games and motivational speaking at high schools and elementary schools. She describes herself as driven, vibrant and energetic. She is a member of the Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority. McElveen currently resides in West Columbia, SC. She has one sister, Tammy, and one brother, Maurice. Her birth date is Oct. 17, 1985.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! Just who is this lass trying to kid? Two years at U of SC (no degree indicated), one year at Lehman Performing Arts (again, no degree indicated) and she works as a receptionist. If she puts as much effort into this game as she does her education, she might make it to the second episode! But I wouldn’t count on it! Har! Har! Har!

Jupiter Mendoza, Age – 30,
Bartender, Los Angeles, CA

Online Bio
Jupiter Mendoza was born and raised in Santa Rosa, CA. She has one older brother, Mario. She spent her sophomore year of high school at Santa Rosa High and then her junior and senior year at Mesa, an alternative high school. In a school of 50, she graduated in the top four. She publicly acknowledged that she is a lesbian when she was 16 years old and is very proud that she had the strength to do so. After high school, she moved to Berkeley for one year and then six years in Oakland, two years in San Francisco and the last three and a half years in Los Angeles. She has been working in the service industry for the last 11 years. Although her ultimate goal is to be certified in massage therapy and watsu (movement of body in water), her dream is to become an entertainment talk show host. Her hobbies include dancing, spinning poi (fire), swimming and writing. She describes herself as a caretaker who is vivacious, outgoing and spiritual. Jupiter has also attended Burning Man for the last eight years. She currently resides in Los Angeles with her one-eyed goldfish named 'Aargh.' Her birth date is March 18, 1977.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! I hesitate ta even call this one a “lass”! She admits being a lesbian and her dream is to become an entertainment talk show host. Someone should point out to this poor child that the industry is flooded with Ellen (the Degenerate) and Rosie (the O-Donut) wannabes.

Kendra Guffey, Age – 38,
Dive Master, Los Angeles, CA

Online Bio
Born and raised in Anchorage, AK, Kendra Guffey grew up fishing and hunting. She considers herself to be a skilled outdoorswoman. Travel is her passion and she has been all over the world, most recently returning from a trek to Everest Base Camp in Nepal at 17,665 feet in October 2006. She was certified as a scuba diver in 1989 in 38 degree-waters in Alaska. She is now a dive master with a certification in shark diving from South Africa. In high school, Kendra was in theater, marching band, pep club, art club and French club. She put herself through college by working summers in the Aleutian Islands as a butcher in a fresh/frozen fish-packing plant. She received her bachelor's degree in English from the University of Alaska, Anchorage. In 1996, she was employed by Sony Pictures in the scuba department. She has also worked as a sound restoration coordinator and administrative assistant. Kendra loves to compete and says she is very stubborn and won't give up without a fight. She considers herself to be adventurous, energetic and curious. In her spare time, Kendra participates in historical reenactments of Victorian balls, sews costumes and cooks period food from historical cookbooks. She also enjoys kickboxing, running, hiking and core training. She has been living in Los Angeles for the last 16 years. She has four cats: Edgar Allen Poe, Annabelle Lee, Calliope and Algernon. Her birth date is May 21, 1968.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! Now here’s a lass what displays that typical old fashioned home grown quality! And a dive master ta boot! She’ll come in handy for retrievin’ all that sunken treasure! Har! Har! Har!

Laurel Schmidt, Age – 21,
Glass Blower, Los Angeles, CA

Online Bio
Born and raised in a middle-class family in Detroit, Laurel Schmidt is a true modern-day pirate. She has been living out of her van in Venice Beach, CA, with a friend and her dog. She moves from beach to beach and campsite to campsite daily to stay out of trouble with the law. Well, that is, until very recently, when her van was impounded. She could not afford to get it out so she turned the title over to the tow company and came to PIRATE MASTER. She is a self-taught glass-blowing artist and uses these skills to sustain herself. She previously worked as a sales associate, waitress and with a moving company. She graduated from Milford High School in Milford, MI. She enjoys skateboarding, swimming, snowboarding, snowmobiling, tennis and dancing. Her favorite sport is lacrosse. She describes herself as silly, hard-working and feisty. Her birth date is April 7, 1986.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! In other words, yer typical unemployed, L.A. BUM. I wouldn’t even let her muck out the bilge, let along swab the decks! She’s nuthin but shark bait! Overboard with ya!

Louie Frase, Age – 43,
Marina Owner, Fishing Creek, MD

Online Bio
Born in Park Ridge, IL, Louie Frase claims he lives, eats, breathes and sleeps on the water. He goes fishing, sailing and boating almost every day and he loves to scuba-dive as well. Frase is a businessman who loves to teach customers about everything his marina has to offer. He has his own dock and rents slips as well. He previously installed piers and stone/wood bulkheads. He is a hard worker and is currently restoring his home. He just finished the roof and is now working on the porch. He once owned a small hubcap store with his wife of 13 years, Linda. They married in Tierra Verde, FL, on a sailboat. In addition to Frase's hobbies, which include fishing, boating and swimming, his favorite sport is football. Frase attended Northern Illinois University. He describes himself as loyal, lovable and humorous. He and Linda have a golden retriever/collie/chow mix named Ellie. He currently resides in Fishing Creek, MD. His birth date is June 27, 1963.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! If Louie doesn’t remind ya of a “big ‘ol lovable Teddy Bear” then ya have a cold, cold heart indeed! Unfortunately, he needs to turn from Teddy Bear ta Grizzly Bear if he hopes ta do well in the cut throat game of Pirate Master!

Nessa Nemir, Age – 29,
Make-Up Artist, Berkeley, CA

Online Bio
Nessa Nemir was born in Oakland, CA, and was primarily raised in Berkeley. She has been on her own since she was 16 years old. She spent sixth grade in Edinburgh, Scotland, while her stepfather was getting his master's degree. She spent many summers living in France. She has an extremely high IQ, speaks three languages and is very athletic. She took nine years of piano and played soccer in high school. She received her bachelor's degree in Italian and special fields (Film) from the University of California, Los Angeles. While at UCLA, she participated in soccer and cross-country running for two years. She also graduated from the Make-up Designory (MUD) in Los Angeles where she specialized in character make-up. She trains with the University of California, Berkeley Men's Boxing Team and used to box professionally. She has also worked as a fitness model. She describes herself as athletic, adventurous, competitive and interesting. She enjoys traveling, backpacking, skiing, painting, reading, writing and dancing. Nessa does not watch or own a television and her last vacation was a trip to Barcelona in November 2006. She's spent the last two years living on a sailboat. She currently resides in Berkeley, California. She has one sister, Lizzie, and one brother, Micah. Her birth date is Sept. 29, 1977.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! For someone with “an extremely high IQ”, I would think she could find a better paying job than Make-Up Artist. Capt’ Cuz is not impressed!

Sean, Twomey, Age – 27,
Bartender, Venice, CA

Online Bio
Sean Twomey is originally from Pensacola, FL, but moved around a lot because his father was a captain in the United States Navy. In high school, he participated in varsity football, wrestling, backyard boxing, theater and the Governor's School of the Arts. He attended four years at Virginia Commonwealth College where he studied theatre and American history. He then attended Mesa Community College, where he studied poetry and advanced English. His mother died suddenly when he was 20 years old, which still impacts him today. He is currently a bartender. His hobbies include reading, surfing, jogging and high diving. He drives a motorcycle and describes himself as selfless and learned. He has driven across the country eight times. Sean previously lived in New York before moving to Venice, CA. He once pursued acting and appeared in many off- Broadway shows. His last vacation was a trip to the Bahamas. Sean is very proud of the fact that he finished all 36 History of the World books by Time/Life. He has one sister, Erin Marie. His birth date is Sept. 7, 1979.
Capt’ Cuz says: ARGH! What’s with all these southern California, bartender/wanna be actors, weaseling their way onto a reality show in the hopes of jump starting their acting careers????? I only have one good eye and I can see this fop for what he really is! Just look at that typical “publicity head shot” and then ask yerself, “Is not Capt’ Cuz givin’ it ta ya straight?” Here’s another shark bait candidate!

ARGH!!!!
Well, there ya have it! A new batch of 16 Media Whores! Ready, willing and able to prostitute themselves for a share of $1 Million dollars.
And true to form, half of them are from southern California (the greater Los Angeles area in fact.)

ARGH! I'll be back next week with the "Legend of Captain Henry Steel"! It's a long read, but well worth it ta give ya some background information regarding the game.
So till then, take care,

ARGH! Send me a FReepmail if ya wants ta be added to the Pirate Master Ping List!

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