As I said above I think people who are struggling with a manuscript and/or story ought to ask themselves which writers they really enjoy
---and then read the writer carefully and see how he/she does it
--- and then try the same thing as an exercise.
For instance, there's a rhythm between sections of dialogue and sections of narrative summary. It makes a good balance and keeps the reader moving along.
Check out Hemingway and/or McCarthy. You'll see long sections of dialogue, and after that, there is a move to another scene but that scene directly afterwards is written in narrative summary, not dialogue.
You need to balance three things
----direct description of action
---scenes with a lot of dialogue
---narrative summary.
Never too long in any one mode, never follow a scene with a lot of dialogue with another scene with yet more dialogue.
Check out your favorite writer and watch how they balance these three elements.
Okay... we are 73 posts in and you have so much to add. I can't wait to read more.