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To: carton253
Be gentle with me! And don't mind the grammar.

Holy Smokes! You're writing a biography!

If that's your purpose, fine...but otherwise you've got to learn to show and not tell. Don't tell us what Jackson's childhood was like, write a vignette from it. Don't lecture us about Jackson's lectures...put us in the mind of a VMI cadet who's sitting through one. Don't talk to us about how Jackson was teased...show us a scene in which it happens.

Please.

223 posted on 03/31/2007 7:43:52 AM PDT by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: Oberon
Thank you

Actually, that is not in the book. It is just an example of how I write descriptive narrative to show as an example so others could comment on it.

As for your other comments... I absolutely agree.

225 posted on 03/31/2007 7:52:16 AM PDT by carton253 (Not enough space to express how I truly feel.)
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