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To: Sax
An Irishman's been drinking at a pub all night. The bartender finally says, "It's time". So the Irishman stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He tries to stand one more time, same result. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up.

Once outside he stands up, again falls flat on his face and decides to crawl the 4 blocks to his home.

At his door, he again tries to stand upright, falls and finally crawls through the door into his bedroom.

Reaching his bed, he tries one more time to stand up. This time he manages to pull himself upright, but he quickly falls right into bed and is sound asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow.

He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting loudly.

"So, you've been out drinking again!!"

"What makes you say that?" He asks as he puts on an innocent look.

"The pub called, you left your wheelchair there."

79 posted on 03/16/2007 9:01:02 AM PDT by girlscout
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To: girlscout

Pat and Mike were very good friends and Pat came over to Mike's house to visit. When he entered the home, Mike wasn't there. Mike's wife was holding their baby and trying to put up curtains at the same time.

She said, "Pat, I'm glad you came, would you mind holding the baby while I finish the curtains?"

A few minutes later, Mike came in and said to Pat, "How Ya doin Pat?"

Pat replied, "I'm holding my own". That's when the battle started


88 posted on 03/16/2007 9:10:27 AM PDT by Sax
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