"Yes, Father?" said the nurse.
"I would really like to see Senator's Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton before I die." whispered the priest.
"I'll see what I can do, Father" replied the nurse. The nurse sent the request to the Senate and waited for a response.
Soon the word arrived, Senator's Kennedy and Clinton would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Hilary commented to Teddy, "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly will help our images and might even get me elected President. After all, I'm IN IT TO WIN IT." Kennedy agreed--it was a good thing.
When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took Ted's hand in his right hand and Hillary's hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face. Finally Senator Kennedy spoke. "Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?"
The old priest slowly replied "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." Amen" said Teddy. "Amen" said Hillary.
The old priest continued... "He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same."
A woman named Jill stood up during her church's prayer
request time one Sunday morning, took the microphone from one of the church ushers, and bared her soul to the enrapt congregation: "I want to tell you about the awful accident that my husband, Jim, has suffered this past month. He was riding his motorcycle, lost control, ran off the highway and hit a tree. He was rushed to the hospital, and could have died, but thank the Lord, all he suffered was a broken scrotum."
The congregation gasped in horror. The men in the congregation were obviously uneasy and writhed in their seats as she continued, "Jim has been in terrible pain all month since the accident. He has trouble breathing. He has trouble swallowing his food. He can hardly lift anything, he's in so much pain, and he has missed work because of it. He can't lift our children up to hold them and give them the personal love that they need. Worst of all, we can no longer cuddle an have intimate relations. He is in constant pain, a pain so terrible that our love life has all but slipped away into oblivion. I would like to ask you all in the congregation to pray for Jim, and pray for us, that his broken scrotum will soon heal and be as good as new."
A dull murmur erupted within the congregation as the full impact of this terrible accident sunk in. Then, as the murmuring settled down, a lone figure stood up in midst of the congregation, worked his way up to the pulpit, obviously in pain, adjusted the microphone to his liking, then leaned over and said to the congregation: My name is Jim, and I have only one word for my wife, Jill. That word is:"STERNUM !"
BTTT-