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Last weekend I had to fly to Sioux Falls to take care of a personal matter. I went to T.F. Green, cleared security, boarded the plane to Chicago, and took my seat. As I began to settle in, I glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman walking down the aisle. She headed straight for me and got into the seat next to mine.

I said, “Hello.” And helped he put her carry-on bag into the overhead compartment. She asked where I was headed. I told her I was bound for Sioux Falls to take care of some business. I then asked her if she was traveling for business or pleasure.

She turned, smiled, and said, “Business, I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Chicago.”

I swallowed hard not knowing what to say. Here was the most gorgeous woman I had ever seen sitting next to me and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs! I struggled to maintain my composure. I asked as calmly as I could, “What’s your
business role at the convention?”

“I am the lead lecturer,” she responded. “My lecture is based on information I learned in my own personal experiences that debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”

“Really?” I asked. “And what kinds of myths have you debunked?”

“Well,” she explained, “one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Scottish descent that are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with the absolutely best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. “I’m sorry,” she said, “I shouldn’t really be discussing all this with you. I don’t even know your name.”

“Let me introduce myself. I am Tonto, Tonto McTavish” but all my friends call me Bubba.”