But I have a teacher certification that indicates that my academic specialization is science, so, yes, I beat you in chemistry/biology. ;D
Some of my faves from *nix lab (rated "PG")...
% indicates command was run in C Shell
$ indicates command was run in bash (Bourne Shell)
% cd /tmp
% touch this; chmod 000 this
% ln -s /usr/bin/touch U
% U this
U: cannot touch this: no write permission
$ ar x "my love life"
ar: my love life does not exist
$ ar x "matey, the treasure"
ar: matey, the tresure does not exist
$ talk Gorbachev@Kremlin
talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address.
$ talk Comrade Khrushchev
[Your party is not logged on]
% make sense
Make: Don't know how to make sense. Stop.
% sleep with me
bad character
% got a light?
No match.
% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.
% \(-
(-: Command not found.
% sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!
$ drink
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found
$ mkdir matter; cat >matter
matter: cannot create
>%touch me
>%chmod 000 me
>%touch me
>touch: cannot touch me: permission denied
$ ar t God
ar: God does not exist
$ ar r God
ar: creating God
$ cat "door: paws too slippery"
cat: cannot open door: paws too slippery
$ cat "food in tin cans"
cat: cannot open food in tin cans
ah, *nix...8^)