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Flatulence, not turbulence forces plane landing in Nashville
http://www.wbir.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=40210 ^

Posted on 12/05/2006 1:36:47 PM PST by AUJenn

Flatulence brought 99 passengers on an American Airlines flight to an unscheduled visit to Nashville early Monday morning. American Flight 1053, from Washington Reagan National Airport and bound for Dallas/Fort Worth, made an emergency landing here after passengers reported smelling struck matches, said Lynne Lowrance, a spokeswoman for the Nashville International Airport Authority.

The plane landed safely. The FBI, Transportation Safety Administration and airport authority responded to the emergency, Lowrance said.

The passengers and five crew members were brought off the plane, together with all the luggage, to go through security checks again. Bomb-sniffing dogs found spent matches.

The FBI questioned a passenger who admitted she struck the matches in an attempt to conceal body odor, Lowrance said. The woman lives near Dallas and has a medical condition.

The flight took off again, but the woman was not allowed back on the plane.

"American has banned her for a long time," Lowrance said.

She was not charged but could have been. While it is legal to bring as many as four books of paper safety matches onto an aircraft, it is illegal to strike a match in an airplane, Lowrance said.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: fartwoman; previouslyposted; searchisyourfriend
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To: AUJenn

matches + flatulence = blue flame


21 posted on 12/05/2006 2:04:26 PM PST by llevrok (When you outlaw flying carpets, only Terrorists will fly planes.)
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To: SIDENET
Fixed your typo:

Darn right. Keep your flatulent self ass off the plane!

22 posted on 12/05/2006 2:10:55 PM PST by null and void (To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone. --Reba McEntire)
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To: GourmetDan
My brother told me how he cleared out a small English pub one time with beer farts.

I can relate.

23 posted on 12/05/2006 2:12:00 PM PST by b4its2late (Liberalism is a hollow log and a mental disorder.)
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To: AUJenn

Sounds like a job for Flat-D...

http://www.flat-d.com/


24 posted on 12/05/2006 2:13:10 PM PST by Ribeye (Protective head wear courtesy of "Reynolds Aluminum Products - Implant Suppression Division")
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To: b4its2late
"I can relate."

You were there???

25 posted on 12/05/2006 2:33:29 PM PST by GourmetDan
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To: atomicpossum
Heaven help the person who has to drive her to her destination now.


26 posted on 12/05/2006 3:24:42 PM PST by OBXWanderer
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To: AUJenn

"In an emergency, the seat cushion serves as a flatulation device."


27 posted on 12/05/2006 5:39:10 PM PST by mikrofon ("Repetition is the sincerest form of flatulence.")
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To: AUJenn

That's one nasty tail wind.


28 posted on 12/06/2006 6:46:46 AM PST by HEY4QDEMS (Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.)
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To: AUJenn
The FBI questioned a passenger

The passenger was suspected of carrying out a terrorist fartwa.

29 posted on 12/06/2006 8:53:43 AM PST by steve-b (It's hard to be religious when certain people don't get struck by lightning.)
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