THREE THINGS TO THINK ABOUT:
1. COWS
2. THE CONSTITUTION
3. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
COWS
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.
THE CONSTITUTION
They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's worked for over 200 years and we're not using it anymore.
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse. You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians -- it creates a hostile work environment.
And from my little senior auntie from Indiana, I share with you:
Tale from Comicland
One day Superman was feeling a bit horny. So, he began to ask his super hero friends for ideas on where he could get a bit of action.
"Hey Batman! Who's good in the sack?" "Well Superman, everyone knows that Wonder Woman is the best sex in Comicland. Why don't you try her?" replied Batman.
"I'd love to, but Wonder Woman and I are friends. So I don't really want to take advantage of her."
"Damn shame," said Batman as he waved goodbye to Superman and drove off.
Ten minutes later Superman was flying low over a city when he saw the Green Lantern patching up a building. He flew down. "Hey GL, I'm looking for a little action. You're a swinging bachelor, who's the best babe in Comicland?"
"Hey, Superman! Everyone knows that Wonder Woman is far and away the best lay in Comicland, why don't you try her?"
"Well, we're sort of friends," Superman said, "but I didn't realize she had gotten around so much" and he flew off in frustration.
Twenty minutes later Superman was flying over a field when he saw Wonder Woman lying naked, in the middle of the field, with her legs apart and up in the air. Superman was tempted. He thought to himself, I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I can be in and out of there before she even knows I'm here."
So with a blur and a sonic boom he was down, in and gone.
Wonder Woman stared up into the sky with a dazed expression. "What the hell was that??" she exclaimed.
"I don't know," said the Invisible Man as he rolled off, "but my a** is killing me.