Your role is to submit to my will. I download when I choose, I lock up your computer when I choose, I only let you know as much as I think you should know. And because I am all-knowing and almost as smart as Rush Limbaugh, I am damn near impossible to uninstall.
Wait, in that last aspect, they're more like vampires. You invite them in and you are in deep trouble.
I go with Allah. Norton had declared jihad on my system resources until I wiped my system and reinstalled. A few reinstalls later, and Norton still will go nowhere near my computer.
Too bad, they were indispensable in the early 90s.