You were playing the odds, and they caught up with you. It could have been much worse, so thank your lucky stars or appropriate diety, and be better prepared for the next time...which may be the *worse one* you just missed.
- what weapon would be ideal for a woman in a car to own?
The next time trouble comes to visit her may well not be in the car. She may be getting in or out of it, at work, atr home, or otherwise. The car itself is a much better weapon than most handguns, if she knows how to use it as such- and is willing to do so.
What safety precautions, such as trigger locks would you recommend, in light of the fact that the weapon will be largely carried in a car? What laws are applicable? It would be simple enough for me to pick up a book (and believe me I intend to), but some things need to be filtered through human experience to get the most out of them.
I don't generally think much of trigger locks on weapons carried for personal defence, since most such devices require that the weapon be unloaded first. An exception, and suitable for automotive carry, is a small safe, bolted to the car floor, in which the weapon can be securely deposited for those instances in which it cannot be carried, such as courtrooms and airports. I used such an arrangement in both personal and company cars while working as an armed courier delivering jewelry and pharmaceuticals and receiving cash. The vehicular safe used was large enough for either the short shotgun or submachinegun I carried to be so stored with relative security, along with other materials yet to be delivered. Unless you are in that or a similar line, you can probably get along as well with something about the size of a lunchbox.
FYI, I can put you in touch with a Tampa-area friend who may be able to better advise you as to local custom; FReepmail me for details. The requirements of Florida law can be seen here, and considerations as to caliber and weapon type are better considered with a little more knowledge about the potential user:
left or right handed?
glasses or corrective lenses? left or right dominent eye?
Any considerations of clothing or accessories [bag or purse] that may influence or limit weapon type
The physical limitation you described makes it sound as if firearms self-defence would be pretty well the only option for her- but carry of a less-lethal alternative [pepperspray or Mace®] IN ADDITION TO her firearm would be a good starting point, and might assure cops/prosecutor/jury that any lethal defensive measures on her part were a final step, and last option. It's mindset that you'll need to develop.
I hope some of the female FReepers who carry for protection have some thoughts to offer for her. But such advice is usually better delivered firsthand.
I'm a small woman with small hands, my first gun was a Bersa .380, because of arthritis in my hands I traded it in on a Tauraus ultra lite 38, I really like the feel and size of it, and the recoil isn't bad. Both conceal well.