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control over one's sleep environment you say?

She felt vulnerable in the darkness until she snuggled up next to the pillow she fondly referred to as the “furnace“. As she slowly slipped off to sleep, thoughts of things she needed to remember for the next day popped into her mind. Errands to run, calls to make and mail to drop off all prevented her from the rest she so craved. She tossed about for a while then finally settled and drifted off to sleep.

The quiet and peace of the moment was suddenly interrupted. A heavy panting in the distance moved closer up the bed. The intruders careful steps crept up on top of her covers until she could feel the moist breath just above her face. She snuggled closer to the furnace in an effort to dodge the intruders next move a minute too late. The sloppy tongue began licking. Droplets of spit flicked her in the eye and she burrowed down deeper. When would the assault end?

In frustration she sat up and said, “ Two words, Wendy! Breath Mint! Now go find some.” With that the clumsy retriever clambered off the bed, tail between her legs, to her rightful spot on the floor.

My experience last night with my two cats:

12:30 am: Cats wake me while trying to catch some type of bug--which is outside the bedroom window and behind the miniblinds. Cats are thrown out.
12:35 am: I failed to close the door because I was half asleep. Cats re-enter and again go bug hunting. Cat 1 is thrown out, door is closed. A few seconds later I get up again to throw out Cat 2, which I did not initially see in the room.
1:15 am: Cat 1 approaches the bedroom door and begins trying to gain entry by pawing at the door. I get up and open the door.
1:30 am: Cat 1 gets into something crinkly. I get up and close Cat 1 in the computer room.
1:40 am: Cat 2 approaches the bedroom door and begins trying to gain entry by tunneling under the door. I get up. Husband says, "Go sleep downstairs! You're getting up too much!" I say, "I hate you and the cats!" I fetch Cat 2 from downstairs and lock him in the computer room with Cat 1. Go downstairs to sleep on the sofa since I am now thoroughly awake. From above I can hear the pawing noise of Cat 1 trying to get out of the computer room.
1:45 am: I put in a pair of earplugs and go to sleep on the couch. If the cats wake my husband, he can deal with them!