Enough chatting - got a movie to go to...
The contradictions are in your mind, not in the Bible. That's not just my opinion. That's the judgement of a huge number of Christian scholars who have not found such contradictions in the Bible over the past 2000 years. Oh, I'm sure you could twist the meaning of the words to invent contradictions. But that's no more valid than the conspiracy theories and false history in Dan Brown's book.
I hope you enjoy the show. I'm sure they line up with your heretical view of scripture and Jesus quite nicely.