My house:
Sound of me falling, tripping,stubbing toe, etc
Family member 1: What was that?
Family member 2: Your mom, bumping into something again
Family member 1: Oh, I thought it was something serious
Sound of entire household laughing at Mom (me) who is a known klutz.
Sound of me calling them all assholes ubder my breath.
The sound of my wife stubbing her toe and the sound of my wife lacerating her finger with a kitchen knife (happened) reach the same level of intensity. Now I just call out "are you seriously hurt?"